As someone of status, she could be said to be a part of the problem. Kieran could easily hate her instantly for her status as a noblewoman, ignoring the fact that she harbored his people no ill-will or hatred. There would be nothing she could say that she felt would convince him otherwise if he were to assume such of her.
Vivien could not live with that thought, as much as it baffled her. She had no idea why it mattered so much; she barely knew him. He was a stranger to her and unlikely to be a part of her life. He couldn’t be.
She was married, after all.
Vivien had to be honest with herself; that was the real reason she did not want Kieran to know who she was.
The minute he knew that she was a married woman, the tone of their conversation would change irrevocably. Kieran seemed to be a man of honor – he would most certainly cease his flirtatious attitude towards her. Vivien did not want to lose that, as dishonest as it was, as improper as it was for someone of her standing to do. She wanted to enjoy the first time a man had spoken to her as something other than a broken wife. He spoke to her in a way that made her knees weak and her heart flutter in her chest. She wanted to enjoy feeling good about herself for once in her life.
It was safer for both of them if he had no idea as to who she really was. She needed to come up with a plausible story, and quickly.
Chapter Five
Vivien took a deep, steadying breath. She could do this. She could keep her identity intact while giving a realistic background. Her mind ran wild for a second until she pulled it back and smiled at Kieran.
“I’m a maid to the new Lady of the manor. I work for the English nobleman who has taken over the English dealings in these parts.” Vivien ducked her head away from him so that he couldn’t see that she was lying. She felt no joy in lying to Kieran, but there were things she couldn’t tell him. Not without ruining her honor, even if it was only in her own eyes.
“Ah, yes, our new neighbors,” Kieran’s manner changed to cold detachment instantly.
Vivien knew the English were an unwelcome visitor to these parts, but she could do nothing about it. As Reginald’s wife, she had a duty to follow him wherever he went, no matter what her own personal thoughts and opinions were.
She ducked back down, poking around the cloth covering the wound, feeling quite hurt that Kieran had directed his anger at her. While she knew it was irrational, it still stung. Why, she couldn’t say. It should not have mattered to her one bit what the Highlander thought of her nationality or reason for being there, but Vivien found his opinion of her was the only one she cared for.
Kieran seemed to pick up on her discomfort, his hand covering hers to keep her from her ministrations.
Vivien started slightly at the gentleness of his touch. She had thought that he would have a hard touch, a rough touch, given all of the calluses on his hands and his lifestyle as a warrior. Instead, he held her hand so softly it felt nothing short of comforting to her. Vivien did her best not to try to disengage her hand from his; she wanted the physical touch more than she was willing to admit to herself.
“I apologize, my Lady,” he said quietly, his hand squeezing hers, forcing her to meet his gaze again, “I dinnae mean tae offend ye. We have had no end o’ issues from the armies o’ England for as long as we can remember. It makes for a hard man, a hard life. But I ken it isnae anything tae dae with ye.”
“I can’t pretend to know much about it.” She smiled tightly. “But your apology is accepted, sir. I know it is neither my fault nor yours.”
Kieran’s eyes softened again as he held her eyes in focus with his, refusing to let up. The man was truly something else, Vivien could not help but think, as that heat continued to roil around between her legs. Butterflies danced away in her stomach, and her heart thumped away in her chest.
She felt overwhelmed; there was simply no other way of putting it. This damn Highlander and his smile, his eyes, his hands, all of it made for her to feel something she had never known before.
Desire.
And that was something that Vivien really had no experience in.
“I just realized you ken my name, but I dinnae ken yours. I can only imagine it must be a song tae my ears. What is yer name, my lady?” Kieran squeezed her hand slightly, still held in his at his side. Vivien had completely forgotten he was holding her hand; it felt so natural and right to her that she hadn’t even considered removing it.
She sighed; Vivien couldn’t give him her real name – to say she was Lady Vivien Stone would destroy every daydream she planned on having about him from here on out. She could choose to lie further, but it didn’t sit right with her. She wanted Kieran to know her real name, not some trumped-up name that had no connection to her. But she could not bring herself to lie to him any more than she already had. She knew she would never see this magnificent creation ever again; that thought brought her nothing but a sharp pang of pain that tore through her heart.
Vivien came to her senses, remembering that Kieran was waiting for an answer. Deciding she couldn’t risk giving him any name at all, she pushed the rag torn from her dress deeply into the wound in his side, eliciting a sharp exclamation of pain from him to distract him.
“Och!” he winced at the sharp push she gave him.
“I’m so sorry,” she apologized quickly. “I noticed the bleeding had not stopped; I didn’t mean to press quite so hard. Oh, I didn’t mean to hurt you,” she babbled along.
“It’s all right, lass,” there was laughter in Kieran’s voice as he tried to shush her, “I’m made o’ far tougher stuff than yer accustomed tae. Pay no mind tae it, I will survive this.”
Vivien nodded, her bottom lip between her teeth again. She could not help but notice the Highlander’s eyes on her lips and felt her own eyes stray to his again. They were fuller than hers and looked perfectly kissable to her.
She wanted to know what it felt like to be touched by those lips – her scandalous thoughts no longer bothered her quite as much as they had before, Vivien noticed. She knew it was wrong, but no one could see inside her head, least of all her husband. Her thoughts were safely hers to keep.
“Of course you will, but be sure to clean the wound when you return to your clan,” Vivien whispered, knowing their time together was coming to a swift end. She felt a pang of sadness at the thought.
‘Aye, tha’ I will dae. But I need tae thank ye, my Lady,” Kieran said, a grin lifting the corners of his mouth.
