“But Dr. Sexy is on call tonight and may stop by to give you a dose of that big dick of his.”
She makes it seem like I’m a booty call when she puts it like that.
“He’s going to be out of town this week, Viv, so it may be my only chance to see him. Plus, I have to study.”
“It’s Saturday night, Izz. You can study tomorrow. And no offense, but you should be out having fun, not waiting around for the doctor to come and give you thirty minutes of his time. Will you ever remember that you have a best friend who wants to spend time with you too?”
I know I do, but Alex said he’s really hoping to see me tonight and I don’t want to let him down. Especially when I know I’m not going to see him for a week.
“Can I just say something?” I can already tell by the look she’s giving me that the guilt is about to be piled on. “I know he’s like your prince charming and that he’s perfect in every way.” She rolls her eyes, only halfheartedly in gest. “But you guys have been dating for over a year now and he’s still throwing out scraps of his time and attention. I know his job is important, butyouare important too, Izz.
“It just feels like you’re the one sacrificing everything for him. You sit around every night waiting for the off chance he might be able to spare a moment of his time. I think you deserve so much more than that. He should make you a priority.”
She doesn’t understand his situation. Being an emergency care surgeon is hard work. It’s not only a demanding job but it’s mentally taxing. So, when he gets home in the early hours of the morning, he just wants to shut off. He’s doing the best he can right now. And I don’t want to pressure him for more. Not when he already has so much on his plate.
“I love you, Viv, and I appreciate you watching out for me, but I’m not unhappy with the way things are. It gives me a lot of time to study so I don’t fall behind with school. And he’s trying to pay his dues now, so we can have more time together later.” He just needs to establish his reputation and then he can start his own practice, which will allot him more free time.
“Yet, it’s a Saturday night and you should be out with your friends, not sitting at home by yourself. Personally, I think you should go out and show that man that you’re not going to wait around anymore. You should make him chase you for a change.”
Except…I really want to see him tonight. He had to cancel on me on Tuesday, and I miss him.
“How about we have a girls’ night tomorrow night?” I ask, hoping she’ll lay off the guilt.
“I’m gonna hold you to that.” She smiles, but it barely meets her eyes. She gives me a quick hug then heads out, and as soon as she walks away, I unlock my phone. There still aren’t any messages from him. It must be a busy night in the ER, which means I’ll be stopping by the store for ice cream on my way home.
Me:Just wanted to let you know that I miss you and hope I get to see you tonight.
I’m feeling beat up now. Viv’s right. I need to make more of an effort with my friends. I’ve wrapped my entire life around Alex and it’s taking its toll on my friendships. And if I’m being honest, it’s taking a toll on me too. He’s canceled on me a lot lately. I’ve been waiting around, excited to see him, only to be let down. Over and over again.
I check my phone again, but there’s still nothing.
When the thirdepisode ofGrey’s Anatomyends, I shut the TV off and pull out my textbooks. I may as well get ahead on my reading for the week. But Viv’s comments keep digging into my thoughts, making it impossible to concentrate. She thinks I just sit around and wait for him to dangle me a carrot, and she’s right. I’ve been checking my phone every five minutes in hopes I’ll get to see him for thirty minutes tonight, but as the clock creeps closer to one in the morning, my doubts grow heavier.
When my phone buzzes, I practically tumble off the couch trying to reach for it. But when I see that it’s Shayna texting, my excitement turns right into concern.
Sis: Hey, Izz. Are you up?
She never texts this late.
“Is everything okay?” I ask as soon as she picks up the phone.
“I just made out with Officer Price.”
She what?!
“You what?! Shayna! Officer Price? The man you wanted to adopt you when you were a kid?”
He was her corrections officer back when she was younger. That man bailed her out of every mess she found herself in. Why on earth would she be making out with him?
“I was ten, Izz. I obviously don’t feel that way about him anymore.”
Obviously. But still. The man is dangerous. He traded in his police badge to become a Savage Knight. And those men are known throughout the entire state as being people you don’t want to fuck around with. Let alone FUCK.
“Yeah, but didn’t you say he was a bossy asshole?” Controlling is more like it. She told me he’s always trying to control what she wears and who she speaks to. I’ve been telling her to quit her bartending job for over a year to get away from that man, and the rest of them, but she won’t listen.
“He was only acting that way because he was jealous. He said he doesn’t like the other men looking at me.”
Jealous?
