"I honestly don't know."
They sat in silence as the last light faded, and Alex tried to convince himself that he hadn't just made everything worse.
It wasn't working.
That night, long after Lily had fallen asleep, Alex lay awake staring at the ceiling.
She was curled against his side, one hand resting over his heart, her breathing deep and even. Moonlight caressed her curls and softened her features, and he thought—not for the first time—that she was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.
Also the most terrifying.
A position I've been considering.The words echoed in his head, mocking him. He'd almost told her aboutHawaii. Almost laid out the whole impossible situation: the job offer, the timeline, the fact that saying yes meant disappearing to the other side of the Pacific for at least a year.
But he'd choked. Because telling her meant having a conversation he wasn't ready to have. Meant admitting that this—whatever this was—had become something he didn't know how to walk away from.
You're already in too deep, his rational brain pointed out.Protecting yourself now is like closing the barn door after the horse has not only bolted but started a new life in another country.
He knew. God, he knew.
The problem was, he didn't know what to do about it. His entire adult life had been built around avoiding exactly this situation—caring about someone who could leave, wanting something he might lose. And now here he was, tangled up with a woman who lived on the opposite coast, whose entire career required her to be constantly moving, who would board a boat in four days and sail out of his life as suddenly as she'd crashed into it.
Ask her to stay.
The thought surfaced unbidden, and Alex's heart stuttered.
He couldn't ask her to stay. That was insane. They'd known each other for two weeks. She had a life, a career, six million people who expected her to keep being Sunny Lily, Adventure Influencer. He couldn't ask her to give that up for a socially awkward marine biologist who'd spent the first three days of their acquaintance being actively hostile.
But you want to.
Yeah. He did.
And that was the most terrifying thing of all.
Lily stirred in her sleep, murmuring something unintelligible, and Alex pulled her closer on instinct. She settled against him with a soft sigh, her fingers curling into his chest like she was holding on.
Four more days, he thought.Four more days of this. Of her.
He should be preparing himself for the end. Building back the walls she'd torn down. Protecting whatever was left of his heart.
Instead, he pressed a kiss to her hair and closed his eyes.
Tomorrow, he told himself.I'll figure it out tomorrow.
It was a lie, and he knew it.
But with Lily warm in his arms and her heartbeat steady against his ribs, it was a lie he could live with.
At least for tonight.
Chapter Nine
Lily woke to the familiar sensation of Alex's arm draped across her waist.
For the past week, her mornings had followed a new ritual: waking tangled in sheets that smelled like salt and him, listening to his steady breathing, and pretending she was still asleep just to enjoy the strange domesticity of it all.
The coffee maker gurgled. She felt the mattress shift as Alex slipped out of bed. A cabinet opened and closed. His footsteps crossed the wooden floor—pausing, she noticed, at the edge of the bed.
Was he watching her sleep? The thought should have been creepy. Instead, it sent a warm flutterthrough her chest.
