I thought about how I could protect Elariya’s family and end Thayden’s miserable life while finding out who’d helped him get to me.
I thought about how I’d doallof that while figuring out what the fuck was going on here in the kingdom with the dark forces, my uncle, and the fucking rebels.
I thought about the ring and how it felt even more impossible to find.
Then I thought about Elariya. Elariya and me.
That’s where I stopped.
I couldn’t see past the block in my mind.
Nor could I see how we could possibly have the happy ending she deserved.
I left the office long after night had fallen and went outside.
There I sensed her presence. I followed it to the rose garden. And that’s where I found her.
Sitting under the willow tree, she hugged her knees to her chest and gazed up at the moon.
She’d changed into one of the simple gowns from the manor. The neckline slipped off one shoulder, exposing skin that caught the moonlight like porcelain. Her blood-red hair hung in loose waves, darker in the night, stirring softly with the breeze.
Her face showed utter distress, like someone who had been slowly, thoroughly undone.
I cloaked myself in shadow and drew closer, close enough that I was a breath away from her.
Weeks ago, she was able to sense me. She couldn’t now.
Her magic was whole—possibly stronger than it had ever been even though she was still a novice. But she couldn’t sense me.
I realized it wasn’t just the magic that drew us together.
It was simply us.
A tear streamed down her cheek. I wanted to wipe it away. I wanted to assure her that I’d fix all our problems. But I couldn’t do either of those things.
How could I whenIwas the problem?
Fate was cruel to monsters like me. Those who walk in the shadows were never meant to find happiness.
In my desperation to protect her, I was already pushing her away.
What if the choice I’d forced on her hammered the final nail in the coffin of whatever remained between us?
The very thing I was trying to prevent—losing Elariya—might be exactly what my actions would cause.
And still…
I wanted to fight for her. Fight to keep her.
Fight to make her mine again.
My mage.
Chapter 21
Elariya
“The Shape of What Was Lost”
