“Yeah,” I admit. “I’m scared she’s gonna wake up one day and decide I’m a complication she doesn’t need. I’m scared she’ll put up those walls and lock me on the outside and I’ll still be in love with her.”
He goes quiet at that.
I hadn’t said that part out loud yet.
“You’re in love with her?” he asks, voice low.
I drag a hand over my face. “I don’t know if that’s exactly what it is yet. It feels big. But I’m on that road. And I’m definitely further down it than she is.”
We step into the locker room. It’s quieter here, the usual gym sounds muffled by lockers and doors and the low murmur of other guys talking.
Wyatt grabs his bag from the locker and sits next to me on the bench. “Look, man. I get it. You don’t want to push. That’s good. But you also don’t have to pretend this is casual in your own head. You’re allowed to want the whole thing.”
“I do,” I say. “In my ideal version, we end up under the same roof. We fight about baby names instead of visitation schedules. We argue over whose turn it is for the middle-of-the-night feeding and then both get up anyway.”
He smiles. “So you’re already living in the sequel.”
“I’m already living in every possible ending,” I say. “Best case, we get there. Worst case, she never wants more than standing at opposite sides of the crib doing the handoff. I’m trying to be okay with both outcomes. My heart’s not exactly on board with worst case.”
“Yeah,” Wyatt says softly. “That part’s rough. I get it.”
I look at him. “Did you ever worry about that? With Blair?”
“Sure,” he says. “Back when we were trying to figure us out, I was terrified I’d screw it up. Or that I wanted more than she did. But I decided I’d rather risk getting my heart wrecked than sit on the sidelines of my own life.”
I snort. “Since when did you become a feelings guru?”
“Since I started sleeping more than four hours a night,” he says. “The clarity is wild.”
I laugh, but the truth of it lands.
“Have you told your mom?” he asks after a beat.
“Yeah,” I say, a little smile pulling at my mouth. “She cried happy tears and immediately asked when she could meet Natalie. Then asked if she should start a college fund. I had to remind her we don’t even know the gender yet.”
“Good ole Linda.”
We finish getting changed and head out into the parking lot. The morning sun’s already warm, the sky that perfect LA blue that looks fake on TV but somehow is real when you’re standing in it.
“Well, the only advice I have is keep doing what you’re doing. Show up. Be patient. Let her see you’re not going anywhere,” Wyatt says.
“And if she doesn’t come around?” I ask.
Wyatt’s quiet for a moment. “Then you’ll still be an amazing dad,” he says. “You’ll still have this kid who knows you chose them every single time. But honestly? I don’t think that’s how this goes.”
“You sound pretty confident.”
“That’s because I know you,” he says. “When you want something, you don’t half-ass it. And Natalie would have to be out of her mind not to see what a good guy you are.”
I want to believe that. I do. But I also know you can show up for someone who doesn’t want you there. You can give everything and still not be enough.
Lauren taught me that.
But I know Natalie’s not Lauren. She’s not using me for a stepping stone or a safety net. She doesn’t want anything from me except that I show up for this baby.
“Thanks,” I tell Wyatt. “I needed to say some of that out loud.”
“Anytime,” he says. “That’s what I’m here for. Gym, beers, emotional support. Full-service best friend package.”
