Closing my eyes, I let my surroundings wash away. My heartbeat may be whole again, but my dreams tell me we are still connected, he and I. And if we’re still tied together, then so am I to his world. There’s no manual on how to do this sort of thing. No instructions laid out for me to follow. So I focus my energy on blocking out the things around me. The things that connect me to my own world.
With my eyes still closed, the blue skies turn black. The lively wind against my skin fades into a vague caress, and the bird calls become echoes in the distance. It’s not long before I feel it. That pull. That tug, lulling me into its binding spell. The coldness rushes through me, and I don’t fight it this time. I soak in the ice, the deadly silence that lies so still in wait.
With my heart back at full strength, this place doesn’t have the full control over me it once did. And this time, it doesn’t have the advantage of surprising me. Of frightening me with the unexpected, the unknown.
This time, I’ve come on my own determination.
This time, I’ve come prepared.
I open my eyes, coming face to face with the familiar sea of darkness.
“Enzo.” I let his name pour out of my mouth in a whisper, knowing he’ll hear me. Hoping he’ll break his promise. Hoping he’ll come for me. Hoping he’s not already too far gone. That he’ll remember. “Enzo, I need you.”
When there’s no answer, I try again. I have to try again.
“Please. Come find me, Enzo. Come find me.”
Within seconds, the fire builds behind me, his burning touch is on my waist, and my eyes widen. I let out a shaky breath. He’s here. He came for me. His grip tightens around me, and I try to engrave the sensation into my brain as I let him pull me away. When we reach the brink, that fine line between his world and mine, I dig my feet into the ground, stopping him from going any farther. There’s still nothing but endless darkness before me, but I know that behind me, where Enzo stands, is a different sight. The trees and the wind, the birds and the dirt.
We’re walking the foggy line between life and death.
I spin around so I can see him, and my heart tightens in my chest, crushing me all over again. He looks down at me, gaze boring into mine, but the green has all but washed away. Black and grey clouds are fixed on me, his expression a stone wall. A stranger and yet not a stranger at all.
“Enzo,” I whisper, reaching up and gently cupping his face with my hands. “My sweet, strong Enzo.”
I slide my fingers over his jaw, until they’re brushing back the hair on his forehead. A tremor runs through him beneath my touch, his eyes falling shut and his grip pulling me closer. My breathing picks up as my chest threatens to burst from within me.
He does remember. Maybe deep down, he’ll always remember.
I lean forward, standing on my tiptoes and lifting my chin. “Kiss me.”
His eyes are still closed when I softly press my lips to his. A shudder slides over him again, muscles rippling as he fights not to kiss me back. I close the small gap between us and wrap my arms around his neck, allowing the curves of my breasts to press against his hard chest, allowing the slight trembles of his body to shake my own. When I run the tip of my tongue over his lips, he breaks.
Strong arms pull me tight as his lips part for me, and he quickly takes over, a rough groan rumbling through him and making me moan in response. He tilts his head, his tongue sparring dangerously with mine, and he gives my lip a bite that tells me he’s not pleased. But the way his fingers dig into my hips argue that, and soon his tongue is wandering to my neck and my head’s falling back.
A small voice in the back of my mind orders me to stop.This is not what you’re here for, she reminds me.You’re running out of time.
I whimper at the thought, but I know what must be done.
My head snaps up, and I guide his lips back to mine. My eyes are wide as I watch him lose himself in devouring me, and a tear slowly slides down my cheek. Our tongues still tangled together, I latch onto the strong and steady sound of my heart’s beat. The beat that belongs to him. Then I do it. I breathe. Straight into his mouth. I seal my lips to his, pouring my oxygen, my soul, the very life of me, into his lungs.
The way he once did for me.
His kiss softens, eyes drifting open. They’re dazed and heavy, confusion taking over. I don’t stop. I breathe and breathe, giving all of myself to him. I wonder if he feels it the way I did; a strong beat playing in his chest and a flutter running down his spine. Can he feel the life pouring through him?
As though in answer, something fierce flashes in his gaze, and he tears his lips away from mine, releasing me from his grip and stumbling back a step, toward the road that’s blurred behind him. “What . . .” His breathing is hard, uneven as he takes a look around like he’s seeing the world for the first time. “What did you do, Lou?” It’s a growl, angry and confused all at once.
More tears spill as I realize it’s working. It’s really working. He’ll finally have his life back. I try to smile, but I know it must look lost and strange.
Because that’s how I feel as the darkness around me seeps into my skin in a whole new way. The ice is no longer ice, but prickling needles pounding into my skin, my soul, one after the other. I cough, the oxygen in my lungs evolving into something dry and scratchy, and this time it’s me who takes a step back.
Closer to the darkness. Further from him.
“No.” His hands are in his hair. His jaw is tight, body rigid, his eyes greener than I’ve ever seen them in my life. “No, no, no. Dammit, Lou! What the hell did you do!”
My voice is steady when I answer, no trace of regret because there is none to be found in my heart. “You saved me once, remember?” I whisper. “Now I’ve saved you.”
His head is shaking. “You weren’t meant to save me, Lou. You’re meant to live your life. A full—” He stops, his face twisting for a second as his fingers come up to rub his chest. He tries again. “A full . . . a long—”
