In any case, from what she could see the military had very little to do beyond police the citizens of Gallen and patrol the area surrounding the city for possible threats—and she doubted there was even much need for that.
Reese and Dante were, she supposed, planters. She had no idea what it was that they produced, but they had a well established plantation. She’d seen the robots in the fields. She supposed Cain would find a place for himself on the plantation, as well.
What about her? She couldn’t simply reprogram like they could. Even if she could find a niche she wanted to fill, she would have to learn new skills, and who would teach her?
Depression settled over her. She’d tried to tell them all that she wasn’t suited to this sort of thing. She had NO skills beyond those she’d learned in the militia. Her childhood had been such a nightmare that she hadn’t even learned the rudiments of homemaking—not that she could see much of a need for it. Dante, Reese, and Cain were completely self-reliant and efficient and they had house ‘bots in any case.
She couldn’t even cook. Unless they had no sense of taste, they were going to be vastly disappointed when it came her turn to prepare the meals.
She had severe reservations that she could even breed right.
She shook the thoughts off after a time, knowing that wasn’t the real root of her current distress.
Cain was.
He was angry with her—unjustly so. She knew he was, no matter that he’d tried to pretend indifference and she knew it was because she’d been with Reese and Dante the night before, which she not only had a right to, but an obligation in the fulfillment of her contract. And she still felt guilty because he was angry. And she resented feeling guilty when she knew she hadn’t done anything wrong.
She supposed it was harder for him to adjust because he’d been created to think and respond to situations like a human and most worlds inhabited by humans still practiced monogamous unions, for the simple reason that humans were territorial by nature, especially human males. He’d even told her that he had been married before. It didn’t matter that it had never really happened. In his mind, it had. In his mind he’d had a ‘normal’ union.
That thought sparked a less palatable one.
She knew it was completely unreasonable of her to expect him to love her—and really she didn’t—but it was lowering to think he might feel no affection for her at all, because that certainly wasn’t the case with her.
Had she completely misinterpreted his behavior only because she was hurt by it? What if he wasn’t angry at all, but truly indifferent? Or, perhaps, he wasn’t angry in the sense that he was jealous as she’d been thinking, but resentful because he hadn’t gotten his turn?
He had such a droll way of putting things that she rarely took anything he said very seriously, but he’d said things to her several times that had suggested that he was merely shopping for a mate because he did not care to be one of the unfortunates who had to do without—which certainly seemed to imply that his main interest was in the sexual aspects of a union.
Of course he’d also said that he was in love with her, more than once, but she knew he was teasing then and she couldn’t take that seriously. She’d thought he must care at least a little, though, or he would not have insisted that he would contract to ‘protect’ her from Reese and Dante.
Perhaps he was only angry because he could see how much she loved Dante and Reese and he thought she wouldn’t honor her commitment to him? Or perhaps that she wouldn’t do so with the enthusiasm that she’d shown them?
Should she try to talk to him, she wondered, to see if he would tell her what, if anything, was wrong?
He hadn’t seemed very receptive to talking, though, and she’d never been one for approaching the unapproachable. She had a hard enough time holding up her end of a conversation when the other person was actually friendly.
She shook her head, realizing she simply didn’t understand Cain. He was far more complicated than either Dante or Reese, or he seemed so.
Maybe she was just being paranoid and he was only preoccupied and it had nothing to do with her at all?
When a full week passed and Cain not only failed to come to her room at night, even once, but was conspicuous by his absence during the day, Amaryllis was completely at a loss. She loved Dante and Reese and thoroughly enjoyed their time together, but she felt like she’d somehow failed Cain.
Chapter Twenty Five
Amaryllis didn’t know whether to be more amused, or more annoyed when, precisely one week after the contract signing, Reese and Dante resumed their routine of before. Obviously, Reesehadresearched the customs of her home world as he’d claimed. Just as obviously, unlike his human counterparts, he was no slave to his passions.
Not that she had any room for complaint whatsoever, but it was more than a little disconcerting to discover that he, and Dante she had to suppose, had been so attentive simply because it was the ‘custom’. They were no less passionate or affectionate afterwards when they were around, but they were rarely around. They’d dedicated the customary week, and then returned to their own interests.
Dante, contrary to what she’d believed, had no interest in the plantation. He had sought additional programming as a physician and researcher and spent most of his day at the med center, practicing the techniques he’d downloaded in real time when he wasn’t working on a research project.
Reese’s primary interest was in designing and building service droids and he was perfectly happy to turn over the running of the plantation to Cain when he discovered that Cain’s interests lay in that direction.
Cain was involved in research and development himself—research and development of marketable plants beyond those used for food and landscaping.
Amaryllis’ personal demons came back to haunt her as soon as she found herself alone and she began a frantic search for something to keep herself occupied and her thoughts directed away from her insurmountable problem. But she knew there was little point in trying to decide on an occupation until she’d had time to research Gallen and see what they had need of, and that option wasn’t open to her at the moment. Aside from the fact that Reese and Dante had both been very vocal about her leaving the plantation without escort, the government had posted warnings suggesting much the same—that women were strongly cautioned not to roam the streets of Gallen without the escort of the males of their household.
The inactivity was boring, but she didn’t particularly want the sort of action she was liable to see if she defied the warnings.
She spent days exploring the plantation itself and came up with no ideas.
