A knot formed in her throat, making it difficult to swallow. Relief was part of it, that she seemed to have averted a battle between Dante and Cain. Part of it was despair at seeing her last hope vanishing like a puff of smoke, but most of it was weariness from the fear and frustration that had been riding her for months now and was getting progressively worse instead of better. Her chin wobbled. “I’m scared. I just don’t know what to do.”
He caught her upper arms, giving her a slight shake, as if he could jog it from her. “Tell me, baby! It isn’t just that you’re afraid they’ll find out about you, is it? I can’t help you if I don’t know what’s wrong.”
The words trembled on her lips, but she found she couldn’t utter them. He wouldn’t understand and he couldn’t help her even if he did. He didn’t have access to the med center, or knowledge of how to use any of the equipment. He would probably be more horrified and disgusted than helpful if he knew she wanted to abort the pregnancy to protect the child from having a life of pure hell. Even knowing what she did from her own experiences, she was as horrified at the necessity of what she had to do as she was determined to spare it from as much pain as possible. “I just … want to go home,” she said lamely.
He didn’t believe her. She could tell from his expression that he knew her desperation to go home wasn’t just a yearning for faces and things familiar. After a moment, he pulled her close and hugged her tightly to him. “You know that’s one thing I can’t give you. I wouldn’t even if I could. Whatever you think about this place, you’re accepted here, as one of us, and no one would harm you even if they knew. Out there, your life wouldn’t be worth one credit. The company will have a price on our heads by now—yours included. It would mean almost certain death even to try it, and to avoid death even for a time would mean being hunted and constantly on the run.
“I love you. Don’t ask me to take you to your death, Mandy.”
Chapter Twenty One
Amaryllis stiffened and pulled away to look up at Cain in stunned surprise.
He smiled wryly. “Isn’t it enough that you’ve got three men who are crazy about you?”
It was too much, actually. On top of everything else, to be torn between her feelings for all three men was more than she could handle. She burst into tears and cried all over his chest.
It dismayed him. He stiffened, but he held her until she’d cried herself out. Finally, she pushed away from him, scrubbed the tears from her face with her hands and made her way to the tiny stream she’d spotted earlier. When she’d splashed cool water over her face until she felt better, she sat back on her heels and looked around a little desperately for something to dry with.
Cain had knelt beside her. He shrugged. “I’d give you my loin cloth, but I’m not at all certain seeing my dangling genitals is something you’d care for at the moment.”
The comment drew a shaky chuckle from her. “I’m sure your genitals are as beautiful as the rest of you, but I’ll use my skirt.”
The sheer veil-like skirt was pretty much as useless as a towel as it was as a skirt, but she managed to wipe most of the moisture from her face. When she glanced shyly at Cain again, she saw that his color was slightly heightened, but he looked pleased with himself. “Men are not beautiful,” he said, mock stern. “It offends the manhood.”
A smile trembled on her lips. “You don’t look offended.”
“It’s hard to be displeased by a compliment. Would you like to see if they’re as beautiful as the rest of me?”
She bit her lip. “I might not be able to contain myself.”
“All the better,” he retorted, chuckling. He reached for her hand. “Come. I’ll take you back to your quarters to rest. You must be weary after releasing such a tidal wave.”
Amaryllis allowed him to pull her to her feet. “I’m sorry I cried all over you,” she said self-consciously.
He tucked a finger beneath her chin and urged her to look up at him. “I didn’t melt and it seems you needed the outlet. Feeling better?”
To her surprise, Amaryllis realized she did. Her head ached and her eyes were blurry, but she was tired, not tense as she had been. She nodded.
He leaned down and brushed a light kiss across her lips. “Good,” he murmured against her lips.
It was dark by the time they reached the barracks once more. Amaryllis was still debating whether to invite Cain in and try to prepare a meal for the two of them when she discovered that Reese was waiting for them in the corridor.
She stopped abruptly and glanced up at Cain. “I don’t want trouble.”
His smile didn’t reach his eyes. “I won’t give you any.”
“Promise me you won’t start a fight!”
Cain glanced from her to Reese and back again. “Readily.”
Reese didn’t wait for them to reach him. He strode down the corridor to meet them. Uttering a low, animal growl when he was still some two yards away, he launched himself at Cain.
Amaryllis let out a squeak of surprise as the two men slammed into each other with a sound almost like a thunderclap. Reese’s weight and momentum slammed Cain into the wall, shattering the thin layer of mortar that had been lathed on the wall as a finish. A fine, yellowish dust clouded the air.
With a growl, Cain slammed his head into Reese’s, then thrust himself away from the wall and drove Reese across the corridor into the opposite wall.
“Reese! Cain! Stop it!” she yelled over the din the two of them were making as they used each other for a wrecking ball, first one and then the other slamming into the walls around them, cracking mortar and throwing more dust into the air.
