He had to be smart, charming, pretty-boy adjacent with his dumb perfect cheekbones and his "wow that's such a cool field" voice and his fucking interest in my Rava's future.
Like great. Awesome. Sexy teacher-off in the sand.
That's what we're doing now? Someone kill me. Better yet, someone killhim. Preferably before he asks Rava if he wants to co-teach summer camp together.
You know what? No.
I won't get mad. I refuse to getmoremad. Let him stand there like some pretty little charity case, talking about education and childhood development like he's auditioning for Rava's diary. Let him laugh at all the right moments, tilt his head like he cares. Let him fucking try. Because while he's busy starving for Rava's attention, begging for a crumb of it, I have Rava shaking under me, crying out, begging me not to stop.
I'm stuffing him full of me until he's gasping into my mouth. And then I wash my hands, fix my shirt, and sit down to eat lunch with his entire fucking family like the good man that I am.
So yeah. He can talk about pedagogy all he wants. I've got Rava's moans memorized like scripture. Fuck outta here.
We're still playing.
Whack.
The volleyball flies straight into Jasper's head. Full impact. Clean shot. Courtesy of Daisy, unintentionally the MVP of my fucking week. My lip twitches.
No. Don't laugh. You're a serious man.
You're working on yourself. Deep breath.
Inhale. Exhale.
You've read one and a half chapters of that self-help book Rava recommended. You are growth. You are patience. You are—
Okay but that noise he made when the ball hit him? That little "oof" like a malfunctioning printer?
No. No. Stop.Don'tsmirk.
You're a man of composure. You're healing. You're in love. Butholy shitthat is satisfying. Lorenzo lets the ball drop and throws his hands up dramatically. "I'm done. I need Bacardi. My soul needs Bacardi. I'm going to sit down before I die."
"I'm coming with you!" Daisy chimes in, jogging after him toward the towels. Jasper lingers behind. Then he turns to Rava."See that girl sitting by the shore? Where the waves hit the sand?"
Rava follows his gaze, squinting.
"She just got appointed to a primary school nearby." Rava shifts awkwardly, offering a polite half-smile. "Wow…did she do a Master's? Or, like, have connections?"
Jasper smiles. "Come talk to her. We're leaving soon, but you've got time."
Jesus Christ. How much more obvious can this get?
What's next? Is he gonna pull out a damn ukulele and start singing a lullaby about inclusive education?
But no. No, I'm not gonna get jealous. He's just going to say hi to a girl who works in the same field. Big deal. Normal people do that. It's called networking. It'shealthy.
Rava looks over at me. Like he's asking for permission.
God, I love him. I nod.
Go ahead, babe. Go talk to Miss Kindergarten Enlightenment or whatever he said. Rava hesitates, then walks off slowly, down to where the waves reach the sand. He sits beside her. And Jasper sits right next to him. I drop down under our tree, grab the rest of Rava's drink, and finish it in one long swallow. I didn't throw a fit. I didn't punch anyone. Didn't mark my territory like a wild animal.
I let him go. Calmly. That's growth. That's maturity. That's me being an emotionally developed adult man. Right?
Jesus, I deserve an award.
10 minutes later
