“The world we live in is full of shades of gray. It’s only black and white to the colorblind. The best people can still make awful mistakes. And sometimes there’s good in the worst of people. You’re not a bad person for feeling something other than hate toward him. Your compassion for the victims and their families makes you a great person, if you’re asking me.”
The sounds of her sniffling faster tell me she’s hearing me, even if she has nothing to say to that, so I go on.
“Emotions are complex, Amelia. The human experience isn’t a simple one. Your feelings are valid. You had a childhood of good memories and it culminated in something unbelievably tragic, but that doesn’t necessarily change the times you had before that. I’m not telling you how to feel about him, or what you’ve been through, but you’re welcome to talk to me about it if you want to and I’m not judging you for any of it.”
She cries harder, and I hold her tight until the sounds soften and her trembles stop.
“I’m a mess,” she finally says, sniffing again, wiping her nose with the sleeve of the hoodie she’s sitting on.
“You’re incredible,” I tell her.
“You have every reason to run from me,” she says, finally finding my eyes with her own.
The fireflies continue their performance, dancing and glowing in the wooded surroundings.
“You see those?” I ask her, pointing to the fireflies as they light up in harmony, circling us in their greenish yellow glow.
“Yeah,” she breathes. “It looks like we’re in a fairy tale. There must be thousands of them.”
“Every one of those fireflies is a reason I have to love you, Amelia. They stretch out forever, damn near infinite. You are the impossible, darlin’. Too good to be true. The way you care so damn much, how you see the world around you, and the way you make my life worth fucking living despite every reason you have to hate the world. You still choose joy, even after what you’ve been through. Somehow, against all odds, you are the brightest light glowing in a world of darkness, and there’s nothing that could make me run from you.”
Her eyes widen, looking between me and the glowing forest around us, eyes rimmed with fresh tears.
“You’re too pure,” she says, shaking her head, like she’s struggling to accept my words.
I let her take her time, making sure she hears them. After a moment, she looks up again, eyes glossy.
“I didn’t even think I was capable of love until you, Weston Grady. I didn’t think I wasworthyof love until you. You fixed that. You see only the best in me?—”
“—I just see the truth,” I cut her off with a smile. She grins, shoving my shoulder with her own.
“You see the best in the world around you, and you make it better just by being you. The world is lucky to have you, but not as lucky as me.”
Amelia turns, facing me fully, making sure I don’t miss her next words.
“I’m the one who gets to love you every single day.”
Reeling from her declaration, I place a soft kiss to her lips, her cheeks, her perfect little nose, and her forehead, keeping my lips pressed to her skin until I collect myself.
“I thought I was broken, I thought I didn’t have the capacity to love until you, Amelia. Turns out I just wasn’t able tolove anyone but you. I don’t know if we fixed each other? Or maybe we were never meant to love anyone until we found one another.”
Her bleary smile, so genuine, full of heartbreak, healing, and a range of human emotion it might take a lifetime to unpack and understand, it gives me all the assurance I needed that I can be the man she needs me to be. The purpose in life I’ve been looking for all this time is right here in front of me. Someone to make laugh, share the load on tough days, and give them a reason to smile every single day.
“Although, for such an important moment between us, you forgot to mention how much you love my dick,” I tease, swooping in to kiss her. When I pull back, I add, “I mean, I could give you a whole ’nother speech just on your tits. Don’t get me started on the rest of you.” My eyes flick over her frame and back up to her face, lips pulling up.
“Maybe I wasn’t done talking,” she says, nose in the air.
“Don’t let me stop you,” I say, smiling. “Go on, tell me more about why you love me.”
“No, I think I’m done now,” she says, face turned away from mine to hide her grin.
“Not even gonna give me like one reason per inch? Surely you have close to a dozen.” I go into a falsetto to do a terrible impression of her voice. “Oh Weston, I love how your cock is the only one that’s ever hit my ribs before, I love that I’ll never choke on it because I can’t even get it past my teeth, and how I come every time I’m even near it.”
We’re both laughing by the time I finish my awful impersonation, but she’s doubled over, leaning down on my lap, giggling furiously.
“I do not sound like that!” she says.
“Naw,” I admit. “You don’t.”
