My best friendhas the weirdest way of blowing off steam. She goes line dancing almost every single week.Ah, no, thank you. You couldn’tpayme to go. If I’m going out for a night of dancing, you’d better believe it’s gonna be to a mix of 2000’s or current pop hits, not some yee-haw shit like my best friend Ellie and Chance listen to.
You’d never guess she was into it if you saw her, to be honest. She looks the furthest thing from a cowgirl. She has this classic, timeless beauty you only see on old Hollywood stars. Asymmetrical but gorgeous features, and natural, long blonde hair that a lot of chicks would cut a bitch for. These blue-gray eyes that shine so fucking bright when she lets herself come through and isn’t holding back. Always been slightly thicker than was popular, with curves I’d do a fair number of questionable deeds for, but that wasn’t in when we were growing up. Being teeny tiny like I was is what was in back then.
Sadly, her brand of beautiful wasn’t much appreciated by the boys of our generation; she wasn’t the kind of pretty or hot that caught boys’ attention throughout our teen years. She only had her first real boyfriend at like twenty, but that’s a story for another day.
Luckily, she’s really grown into that beauty over time, and has managed to cultivate a style all her own that plays to it. A lot of what she wears has this gorgeous, almost vintage vibe to it, classy and flattering. I can’t remember the last time I saw her in leggings, ffs, and she’s a millennial like me. The audacity! She doesn’t rock the full glam look like I do, but she does do a full face of makeup every, and I do meanevery, day. I love that I get to see her almost every time I visit Chance at work, as she’s his boss. Well, sort of.
We’ll have to settle for texting
Hope you’re not in a meeting rn. Things with Chance are weird lately and I’m ready to rip his dick off
[eyes emoji]
What happened?
I found him beating his meat the other night and we haven’t had sex in forever. I’m talking weeks Ellie
I was right there in bed and he picked his hand over his wife
One, going to pretend like your husband isn’t my employee for this convo, because, eww
Yes, he is now Ricardo, my lover from Barcelona, and definitely not your employee rn
Good deal. Two, am I being logical or emotional about this?
Because it sounds to me like you should just sit down and talk it through with him
He would never hurt you intentionally, and there’s always two sides to every story
I have never seen another husband love his wife as much as that man adores you, if you tell him what’s upsetting you, I’m sure he’ll crawl over broken glass to make it right for you
EMOTIONAL Ellie! Come on
When do I ever want your logic when I’m pissed off
Oh
My bad
Sorry about that
FUCK HIM
WHAT AN ASSHOLE
Want me to slash his tires? I know where he works
(How’d I do?)
You’re such a fucking idiot, why can’t you be emotional sometimes? You’re a Cancer for fuck’s sake
It’s fun on the dark side. Come join me.
You at Tar-jay?
You psychic?
Yes [crystal ball emoji]
