“Are we calling it a secret that you wanted to do a beer tour of the entire UK for your honeymoon?” Her voice is dubious, teasing, but her eyes are sparkling at me, as effervescent as that drink in her hands.
“You won out on that one, huh?”
“An all-inclusive resort in the Virgin Islands? I mean, you aren’t saying it wasn’t abitmore romantic than getting shitfaced on the streets of England and Scotland?”
“I didn’t say I didn’t have fun…” My eyes rove her cute little body, in another fucking skirt, picked to drive me insane, prolly. “That private pool out back of our bungalow was fun. Made good use of that.”
Her gorgeous hazel eyes heat at the reminder of those five days and four nights we scrounged and saved so hard for. We got our money’s worth, though.
One delicate hand darts out suddenly and shoves me away, breaking the mood our memories were making for us.
“Stop,” she commands me. And like I always will, I give her what she wants.
“It’s not just sex our relationship is missing, Chance. There’s other types of intimacy, ya know. Stop trying to seduce me with reminders of all the times you got me off.”
I hold my hands up in innocence. “Forgive me, it’s where my mind naturally goes when topics like our first night together, or our honeymoon, come into play.” Her eyes narrow on me playfully. “How about we revisit some of the other things we talked about on that date, then?”
“Like what?” Chrissy tilts her head back to drop a messy piece of brie in her mouth, honey dripping from her fingers. I’m momentarily distracted, watching her clean those fingers with her tongue and teeth. My groin throbs at the sight, but I force myself to move on.
“Well. We talked about the future. What we wanted from it. Why don’t you tell me what you want from your life at this point in it?”
I lean back, both arms extended behind me, holding me up, all my focus on her as she works to swallow what’s in her mouth, mind racing.
“Jesus.” Her eyes bounce around the room, finally settling on my own, which haven’t strayed from hers. “I don’t think that’s something I’ve thought about in…” her head shakes from side to side as she’s lost in thought. “I don’t even know anymore.”
She leans forward, pouring another glass for herself, and ponders some more as she sips it.
I just wait. Just like on our first date, I find myself enamored with everything this woman does. Can’t wait to hear her thoughts, anything she wants to share with me. Find myself eager to help her make that dream of a future into a reality for her.
“I want our kids to be happy,” she finally says with deliberation. “I want a life where our kids are a huge part of it, even after they’re out of the house. Where they’re strong enough, smart enough, well-equipped with what they need mentally to go live their own dreams, whatever those end up being.”
I smile at that. It’s quite a contrast to the answer she gave me all those years ago.
“I want to be in love,” she continues, and my breath halts. “Madly in love with someone who loves me for me, appreciates what I have to offer, and still having great sex, even if we’re old.” The fact that she’s saidsomeone, and notyou, isn’t lost on me. Feeling thankful I haven’t eaten much of this spread, because my stomach is now living in my throat at the thought of that future for her, without me in it.
Fuck. No.
“I miss having more of a life. Seeing Lola and then Ellie made me realize how much Idon’tget to see the friends we do have, or anyone who isn’t directly involved in our kids’ lives. So some sort of social life would be nice. Especially once the kids are teens and less interested in spending time with us. We’ll need people to remind us we aren’t as lame as they’ll think we are.”
I chuckle softly at the image. Her finger taps on her small chin, her large cheeks rosy and high on her face as she continues thinking.
“It would be nice to, I dunno, condense the hours I work? It takes me so long to get ready and get everything together, that when I go in for a job here and there, it ends up wasting so much of my time, and sometimes I think it’s not really worth it. So maybe more of a work-life balance.”
She grabs another cracker with some meat and looks back at me.
“That’s probably about it for me, maybe some travel along the way? What about you?”
“Well…” I start off, leaning forward again, running my palms up and down my legs. “Since we did this the first time, I fell in love. Met the woman of my dreams.” Her cheeks warm, pink diffusing her deep skin tone, and I keep going. “She became everything to me. Then she gave me a kid. And I never knew what my life was missing until that day. And she did it again. And again. And believe it or not? A-fucking-gain.” Her blush spreads, reaching her ears now. “My life is so fucking full with these five people, as long as I have them in it, I don’t think I care what my future looks like much beyond that. But if I can get greedy for a minute, here’s what I’d love to see. More family time with all six of us. The dog, too, he’s pretty cute. Maybe a life where our kids go to bed on time more often than not, so maybe I can sneak in a few nights a week with my wife. Remind her how gorgeous and irresistible she is every chance I get. Spoil her more where I can.”
Chrissy shakes her head, her eyes rolling just a teeny bit at the words, but I mean every one.
“I’d love to travel more with her when we can. She used to want to see all these places. New York City at Christmas, the Northeast in the fall, the Caribbean in summer, Yellowstone in the spring.”
Those hazel beauties get watery on me. “We saw the Northeast in fall.”
That trip was so much better than I thought it was gonna be. Actually super fucking cool. We had some of the best food of my life up there on that trip, kids got to jump into these huge piles of leaves, we all had a blast.
“We did, didn’t we?”
