ONE
ELLIE
This should get his attention.
Me
I want to try something new tonight… [wink emoji]
Can’t get much less subtle than that, David.
Images of us flood my mind’s eye. Me, pinned underneath my boyfriend, one of his hands holding both of my wrists over my head on the bed while his other is pressing tightly against my mouth, stifling the screams I can’t hold back as his hips pump ferociously, driving me to levels of pleasure I’ve yet to achieve with my partner of five years. A flutter of excitement passes through my lower stomach at the image I wish was real, and I shake my head to clear the dirty thoughts.
I’m not one to daydream on the clock, but this need inside me for something…moreout of my relationship has been bubbling over for some time now, and I think it mightfinallyfind its release tonight. So maybe I’ve been a little distracted during work today, which is unusual for me, so sue me. Take it out of the, oh, between fifteen to forty extra hours I put in on a weekly basis.
My mind wanders back to another scenario. Me, waiting for David to get home from work, dressed in that new black lingerie set Ialmostsplurged on but deemed too impractical, ready to welcome him home properly, on my knees, my hands grasping his—my train of thought, that impending mental release, is interrupted by a vibration coming from my desk.
David
I’m in a meeting.
I blow out a deep breath.Right.I can think of a thousand better responses to your long-term girlfriend’s first attempt at sexting other than “I’m in a meeting,” but then again, if David and I were on the same page…sexually, I wouldn’t be trying to switch things up in the first place. We’re on the same page in virtually every other area of life, but no matter how I try, nothing seems to change in the bedroom. My more subtle, gentle hints in the past clearly haven’t worked, so maybe I need to up my game here.
I drum my fingers on my desk, the light tapping of my fingernails filling my ears as I try to decide if it’s worth rocking the boat by sending a sarcastic response, or if I should just wait for his meeting to end and see what he comes back with.
I dive back into my work and before I’ve made a conscious decision on whether or not to be a bitch to my responsible and polite, if somewhat-less-sexual-than-me, live-in boyfriend or act like the mature, patient, empathetic adult I am a majority of the time, my phone buzzes again.
Do you want to do something other than taco salads tonight? It’s Thursday taco salad night…
Okayyyyy, I guess I need to spell it out for him.
A frustrated groan leaves my lips before I can help it and I glance around my work space to make sure nobody else heard me. Having my own office is pretty convenient for privacy, even if I do feel a bit isolated from the bulk of the staff sometimes.
The large white desk, the oversized, ultra comfy executive chair, and gold knick knacks that adorn the desktop and shelves keep me company in here during the hours where half of my team aren’t huddling in here for Brain Sparks—that’s what my dad calls our brainstorming sessions where the team puts their heads together to come up with brilliant ideas for our clients. But being a vice president and COO of not one but two of my dad’s marketing firms, responsible for more than fifty staff and hundreds of clients at the age of thirty-one, well, it means I have to earn any inkling of respect I get around here, and groaning like a bratty toddler hasn’t served me well in the past. I tend to keep my emotions in check around the office these days.
I let out a (much quieter) sigh, let my mind wander back to getting David as excited for tonight as I am, and let my fingers tap out what I come up with.
I was hoping to do you [wink emoji]
I sent that last message with the invisible ink feature, just to be safe. This is new territory for both of us, I’m sure, but the last thing he needs is for one of his fellow financial analysts to see his girlfriend sexting him in the middle of an important meeting, for crying out loud.
Oh. See you tonight.
Oh?I’m not sure what I was expecting, but I was certainly hoping for a slightly different response than “oh.”
Don’t get me wrong, David is a great guy and he’s been a wonderful life partner. He’s brilliant, stable, calm in every situation, he’s…the smart choice for me. But I’ve never felt truly fulfilled with him in this one itty bitty area. While I spent the first few years of our relationship thinking maybe sex and carnal desires weren’t all that important—we’ve aligned in all the truly necessary ways—as the years pass, it’s becoming more and more important to me. Something I’m not sure I can continue to brush off or look past and still convince myself I’m happy.
So I’m trying to take a proactive approach to changing that, like I would in business, rather than complaining about it to my bestie (who has her own issues to deal with and quite honestly doesn’t have time for my shit, though she’d never say that), or even worse just moping around the house, hoping he intuits what I’m upset about and magically fixes it on his own.
If delicately hinting at it with him in the past hasn’t brought about the change and resultant fireworks I was hoping to see, neither has asking for it directly over text (apparently), it’s time to take the next step.
Tonight, I’m going to seduce my boyfriend.
TWO
ELLIE
Maybe I should feel proud that I got him to break routine and make love on a weeknight.
