Murphy’s brows shot up in bewilderment, the anxiety gnawing at his insides replaced with profound relief and more than a little confusion. “So,” he drawled slowly, “these arehappytears?”
Then why was his mate sobbing like he’d broken her heart?
Nessa nodded, her chin wobbling. “I can’t believe I thought you were a huge dick when I first met you.”
“In your defense, I was a dick,” he replied lightly, hoping to draw a smile from her. Her lips twitched, and then she threw herself at him, burying her face against his chest, her shoulders shaking from the force of her sobs. He wrapped his arms around her slender frame. “You know you can talk to me about anything, little mate,” he murmured, kissing the crown of her head.
Nessa took a shuddering breath before she fell silent. They remained like that, locked in a tender embrace, until the water hitting his side turned lukewarm.
“I didn’t think about anything bad the whole time,” she mumbled into his chest. “I thought I’d have flashbacks, or something would trigger my anxiety, but …” She cleared her throat, holding onto him a little tighter. “All I thought about was you. About how I wished we’d taken this step sooner. You make me feel so much, Murphy, and I don’t just mean sexually. I meaneverything. No one has ever made me feel so happy and safe before.”
Murphy’s heart squeezed painfully in his chest, a combination of joy and somberness warring within him. He loved that he could treat Nessa so well, but it absolutely gutted him that she’d never had anything close to that with any partner before him.
He pressed his lips against her hair, lingering there. “Your happiness is all I want, Nessa.”
“I know.” She pulled her head from his chest, staring up at him with red-rimmed eyes that held so much emotion the breath caught in his lungs. “Thank you for giving me this. For being so mindful of my needs.” She frowned, her brows snapping together. “Is that why you didn’t mark me, either? Because we didn’t talk about it before?”
“Yes. I want to claim you, Nessa, more than anything,” he assured her, pressing his lips together into a flat line as he thought about his next words carefully. “But before we take that step, I want to know more about you. About your life before Montana.”
She drew back from him, her gaze growing shuttered. Defensive. “Is that really necessary? You know who I am, Murphy.”
“I do.” He sighed, cupping the nape of her neck. “You told me back at the diner that you’d consider discussing your life with me. I want that. Whatever you tell me, it will never change how I feel about you. Or how I feel about us. This is forever, Nes. I just want you to trust me with your heart and your secrets. I am happy to wait for as long as you need before you’re ready.”
He’d mark her right now if she truly wanted that, but if she wasn’t ready to confide in her past, how could she really be ready to tie herself to him? Mates were for life, and he needed to be assured that she was ready for that.
They’d already progressed their relationship faster than he thought possible with both of their hang-ups, and he didn’t want the pleasure from sex to cloud her judgment.
Nessa looked away from him, clenching her jaw so tightly he was surprised he couldn’t hear her teeth grinding together.
“Let’s finish our shower,” he suggested, not wanting to overwhelm her with anything else.
“Okay,” she said softly, releasing her hold on him to lean back against the tiled wall.
Silently, Murphy grabbed an exfoliating net dangling from a hook, lathering it up with her body wash. Next, he cleaned his mate’s body, taking his time as he washed every inch of her. He paid extra attention to her gentle curves, using his hands to wash her pretty breasts before he grabbed the thick globes of her ass, spreading suds all over her backside. Once he finished, he squeezed her cheeks, pulling her in close.
“You’re enjoying this a little too much,” Nessa commented with a small, abrupt laugh. “My butt is more than clean.”
Murphy squeezed her ass again, cupping her smooth skin lovingly. “Nothing wrong with a male admiring his mate.”
She arched a brow. “Is that your way of telling me you like my butt?”
“Mm.” Murphy leaned in, kissing her gently on the lips. “I love your butt. The amount of times I’ve envisioned bending you over the counter at the teahouse and fucking you from behind is honestly concerning.”
He could picture it now, and his cock stirred to life, his sensitive tip bumping against her pussy.
He’d rub the length of his shaft between her cheeks first, teasing them both. And when he’d tortured them enough, he’d slip into her wet, eager cunt from behind, watching her ass bounce on his dick each time he pumped into her.
He nearly groaned just thinking about it.
“Theteahouse?” This time, when Nessa laughed, her eyes lit up. “That’s so weird, Murphy.”
“Weird?” He scoffed in mock irritation. “I didn’t even tell you if there were patrons visiting your fine establishment in these scenarios.”
Her mouth dropped open in shock. “You’ve thought about having sex with mein frontof people?”
He shrugged, feigning nonchalance. “I’m not going to answer now that you’re judging my fantasy.”
“I’m not judging you,” Nessa replied quickly, unable to disguise her curiosity.
