“Here’s to brotherhood,” Luke booms exuberantly.
“Yeah,” I say with a slur. “You guys are the only people I can really trust to stick around.”
“That’s not true,” Beau says with a pat on my back.
Liam pulls a sour face. “Just let him have his pity party, will you?”
“Yeah,” I scold, “you big…” I search for a blink, finding that my vocabulary has dwindled. “Mean…face.”
“Geez, you reallydon’tdrink often, do you?” Luke laughs, and the others join in.
“He’s hadonedraft,” I hear Liam say.
Beau gives my back another pat. “Heisour baby brother.”
“Don’t talk about me like I’m not here.” I think back on a term the waitress used when we ordered the first round. “These mugs are giant. And don’t act like you guys didn’t ask for the strong ones. I heard you say high tip.” When that doesn’t sound right, I try again. “Top. I mean point. High point.” I shake Beau’s arm off me like it has cooties, feeling more agitated and irritable by the minute.
“You and your perfect little relationship with Kirsten,” I snap, “who, by the way, should have a harder time trusting men than Maggie does after whatshe’sbeen through.”
I let loose the diatribe I’ve memorized over the years, reciting all the excuses I have to be fearful and patting myself on the back for being the one to stick things out this time.
The gold liquid in my second mug gets lower, and the overhead lights start to tip and sway, but my message must be heard. “And over something I did likethreeyears ago?” I gripe. “Get over it already.”
“This isn’t how I pictured the night going,” Luke says to Liam.
“Me neither,” Liam agrees.
I flinch. “Oh, I’m too boring for you guys?”
“Try too whiny,” Luke mumbles.
Beau stands to his feet, pulls a few bills from his wallet, and drops them onto the table. “Why don’t you guys head over to the bar and start a new tab. I’ll make sure Braxton gets home all right.”
I don’t know how it happens, but soon, I’m hobbling up my porch steps, my arm draped heavily around Beau’s back. He punches the code to my garage keypad and helps me inside.
Once I hit the sheets, my emotions turn on me. Gone is the hot indignation that fueled me on after Maggie stormed off and left me feeling like a sap. In pours all the sorrow and sadness I’ve stored up for years.
Blaine died.
Everyone is divorced.
Mom and Dad are getting old.
And now, I lost Maggie, the woman I hoped to spend my life with.
21
Maggie
I wake up to the sinking feeling that the heart hole is back—sucking the hope and happiness from me without mercy.
Things between Braxton and me are over.
I wondered if I’d feel differently after a not-so-good night’s sleep, but I’m even more certain than I was last night—there’s no saving this. I don’t want Braxton if he can’t acknowledge how much he hurt me, and I’m sure he doesn’t want a woman who could fly off the handle over something that happened so long ago.
A flood of embarrassed heat threatens to consume me as I consider the fit I threw in front ofBraxton, his brothers, and Chad and Viv, too. Did his parents hear it from the patio while soaking in the hot tub? I hope not; that’d be a crummy end to their evening.
I shrug, knowing I can’t undo it now, not sure I’d want to even if I could. The fact is—this breakup is inevitable. We may as well just let the relationship disintegrate now before we waste a bunch of time trying to fix it.
