Vaughn touched her chin with two fingers and tilted her face up so that they looked at each other again. “Even if that’s a true expectation of some men when it comes to their lovers, that isn’t mine. I already told you, Evie, Ilikeyou.”
She had been told far more flowery and romantic sentiments over the years. Declarations of great love and passion from men who behaved like they were part of some romantic play while they waxed poetic about her eyes or her hair or whatever their preferred feature was until they bored of it all.
But this simple statement from this man felt like it wended its way past protective barriers. Worked its way around her heart.
“I like you too,” she admitted. “And I suppose our arrangement isn’t exactly the normal kind anyway. So perhaps there’s more room for—for truth.”
“I think we both deserve it after everything else,” he said. His fingers smoothed across her cheek again, still so exquisitely gentle. “I want you stay, Evie. Will you stay with me tonight?”
She nodded and drank the rest of her water, trying to put herself back into the correct mindset. “Let me splash some water on my face and then I’ll be ready to be the seductive goddess again.”
She moved to stand, but he caught her hand. “You misunderstand. I’m not asking you to stay so we may finish what we started. I want you stay with me with no expectation.”
“You don’t want to make love?” she asked.
He let out a laugh. “I never saidthat. We’ll do that again, I hope many times before we’re finished with each other. But tonight I want to just…hold you, Evie. Just lie with you and be happy that you trusted me enough to share what you shared. And be happy that you survived it. Will you stay?”
She hesitated. All this was so intimate, far more intimate than any sex act they could share. She’d been warned against becoming truly intimate with a man. She’d also ignored those warnings in the past and been hurt.
But tonight she couldn’t deny Vaughn. Perhaps more truthfully, she didn’t want to, and so she nodded. He smiled like it mattered. They moved to his bed together. He helped her out of her half-unfastened dress and took off his own boots and shirt. They climbed under the crisp sheets and he opened his arms so that she could curl into him, his solid form and heat wrapping around her like a blanket.
And as she lay there, his fingers threading through her hair gently, she realized with a start thatthisman was who she’d always wanted Harry to be. Who she’dpretendedthe duke was, even if he wasn’t.
And yet Vaughn wasn’t hers, not really. He wouldn’t ever be. A troubling thought to drift to sleep with, but she was so exhausted that it was the last thought on her mind before dreams took her.
* * *
Evie had been asleep for an hour and still Vaughn watched her in the fading light of the dying fire. He felt compelled to do so, to note her every movement and catch of breath. Her expression had softened over that time, earlier restless dreams giving way to deeper sleep as he cradled her. At least he could let her have that rest that she so richly deserved.
He smoothed a hand along her bare arm and she cuddled even closer with a murmur. He admired a great deal about her and always had. When she’d been with Southwater he’d always considered her intelligent and bright and fun to be around. He’d never delved deeper than that surface impression because she wasn’t his and he was married and tried not to be a total lout, no matter what Florence did.
But in the past few weeks, he’d grown to know Evie on such a deeper level. Their arrangement had revealed more and more about her. Yet until tonight, until the gift of her shaky confession, he hadn’t realized her greatest characteristic was her strength. With all her softness and gentleness and kindness, at her core was a steel rod of resilience. An ability to keep getting up even when she’d been knocked down by those who had vowed to protect her.
He wasn’t certain he had half that quality. After all, he was so rocked by the betrayal of his wife and friend that he plotted revenge schemes and brooded in corners. Meanwhile, Evie built herself a life out of ashes and kept going even when it hurt.
He was humbled by that. By her. And found himself wondering more and more about her. Wanting to know more, to understand more. None of that had anything to do with Southwater and Florence or a false arrangement or even a very real passion that now connected them. It had to do with how remarkable this woman was.
Now he just had to start sorting out what to do about that. And with how he wanted this to continue.
CHAPTER16
Evelina set a plate heaped with delectable items at her place on Vaughn’s right at the breakfast table and smoothed her skirt before she sat down. He had been reading the paper and he folded down the edge to look at her with a teasing smile. “I like to see a healthy appetite.”
She laughed. “You do inspire it, my lord.”
He joined her laughter and returned to his paper. The teasing wasn’t a lie, of course. She hadn’t left his home for two days. Not since the night when she panicked about being trapped in her gown and confessed her past to him. In that time, they’d shared a great deal of passion. The man still looked at her like he wanted to devour her and often followed through.
And yet things had also changed in that time. The relationship between them felt…gentler…somehow. Not like she was cracked glass that needed to be protected, but more like she was something precious. Together they read the book he’d gifted her and played games and walked in his lush gardens while they talked about nothing…and everything.
The one thing they hadn’t talked about, though, was what Evie had heard about his wife and the potential for a pregnancy with Southwater. It wasn’t that she hadn’t thought of it. She often had, dashing herself on the rocks as she tried to find the right words to share the rumor. But then he’d laugh or suggest they do something amusing or push her onto his bed and she couldn’t take away the lightness from him. She couldn’t destroy him, especially since she didn’t even know if what she had heard was true.
Her desire to protect him was just as troublesome as the rest. This was all beginning to feel very real. That it was transforming again from a mere revenge scheme and later passion to something with more depth of feeling. Something that could cause an authentic broken heart.
She shook her head and pushed those thoughts away. She wouldn’t be so foolish to allow that. “And what is on your agenda today, Vaughn?”
He folded the paper entirely and set it aside to fully focus on her. It was always startling when he did that, which he did often, because those green eyes seemed to see all. “I would love to tell you that my agenda was to stay here with you another day, try to best you at lawn darts for once and then make love to you in the orangery.”
“You’ll never best me at lawn darts, you must learn to accept the facts,” she teased. “And the rest sounds very nice.But…”
