She shook her head. “Vaughn,” she corrected herself. “I’m sorry, I’m just a little flummoxed to have you here.”
“Oh,” he said. “I’m sorry, I thought Arabella would tell you.”
“She did. About ten minutes ago,” she said, and now she laughed.
He didn’t. “I’m sorry, Evelina. If I’ve intruded into a space where I’m not welcome-”
“Oh, they welcome you,” she insisted.
He shook his head. “I wasn’t talking aboutthem.”
She blinked up at him and in that moment all she could wonder was how his wife could be so foolish as to step away from him. How could anyone not want him, both for his beauty and his passion, but also because he was such agoodman? Those were rare enough in the world. When one found one, they were something to be kept. Treasured.
“Evie? Should I go?”
She blinked as she realized he was expecting a response. “No. No, I’mhappyto have you here.” She squeezed his hand. “It will be great fun.”
She knew that would be true. Her sisters would ensure it and Silas and Caroline would only multiply it. But she still found herself nervous. Thanks to Arabella’s interference, this arrangement’s hue had been altered. They were no longer merely partners in the annoyance of their former lovers. They were no longer simply lovers. This was yet another escalation into closeness.
“What will you have, Blackburn?” Silas asked as he moved to the sideboard. “I’ve a fine whisky that Arabella probably purchased from some smuggler.”
Arabella laughed and her eyes lit up as she looked at her husband. “I’m not going to say you’re wrong.” She winked at Vaughn. “I was once a…afriendof a gentleman who made such arrangements and he’s still kind enough to pass along a few bottles.”
Evelina could see Vaughn was surprised by that admission and by the fact Silas just laughed and showed no jealousy. That was one of the things Evelina liked most about her brother-in-law. He never tried to stifle her sister’s bright spirit and he never exhibited even a hint of annoyance at her past life.
“Well, I shall have whisky then,” Vaughn said with a chuckle before he squeezed Evelina’s hand and moved toward Silas. Silas poured the liquor and handed over the bottle to Vaughn so he could examine it. They stood together, chatting about the whisky and drinking it while they made orgasmic sounds of pure pleasure.
Evelina jolted as Caroline stepped up next to her and slid an arm through hers. Her aunt smiled at her. “Blackburn seems a good fit for Silas. He said they knew each other in school, didn’t he?”
She nodded and continued to watch the men. Silas was often standoffish with men of rank—as a bastard he was as wary of them as courtesans occasionally had to be. But her aunt was correct that here he looked comfortable. For a brief moment, she could see a path where this could happen often. Vaughn could fit into their family circle with little effort.
Strange that she’d never fully pictured Harry in that circle. He had barely tolerated her family. When Silas had entered the picture, he’d said nasty things about him, talking about his bastard blood. And he’dhatedthe family gatherings and cried off from them even when she’d dared invite him and violate theno protectorsrule.
She shook off those thoughts, they were only silly and dangerous.
“Yes, Eton, before Silas was kicked out, if I recall,” she said.
Her aunt squeezed her arm a little. “Dearest, are you well? I know you’ve suffered and this whole situation is beastly.”
She let out her breath in a shaky sigh. “It is. But time heals, I know it to be true.”
“Is it just time?” Caroline pressed. “Or is it company?”
Evelina blinked up at her. “You know we’re only pretending. I realize you must not approve, but don’t get your hopes up about this being something more. When Vaughn is satisfied that we’ve made our point, I suppose he’ll be done with it.”
Caroline glanced at the earl, and in that moment he looked back and when his gaze fell on Evelina, he smiled. A bright, genuine expression that once again made her heart skip.
“If you say so,” Caroline said. “I suppose you girls know far more about how to read a man than I do. And I don’t disapprove. I understand. My only interest is that you don’t get hurt.”
“Well,” Evelina said with a shake of her head. “No one can guarantee that, no matter what we do or don’t do.”
She meant the words, just as she meant the admonishment that the relationship wasn’t real. Only sometimes that was hard to remember, especially when her traitorous mind tried to build futures out of smoke.
Was she just desperate? She’d believed she’d have a future with Harry, too, and that had been just as false. And yet she edged toward the same mistakes now and with a man who’d already agreed that couldn’t happen.
She needed to toughen up. Put up her walls. Protect her heart even if she very willingly surrendered her body.
To do anything else was the height of stupidity.
