Evelina nodded as she picked at her lemon tart. “And do you think that starting some kind of public affair with me would hurt Blackburn more than he’s already been hurt?”
“You care about that?” Caroline asked.
There was a question. Care about that, care about him? She barely knew him.
“I’m not sure the man is thinking straight,” she said slowly. “and one of us must consider the consequences. Even if I can’t hurt Harry, having a public affair will raise my worth when I’m truly ready to go back out into the courtesan market. But if it’s going to hurt the earl in some way, I must be the one who is reasonable.”
Caroline considered the question as she took a bite of her tart and chewed. “When the divorce was first announced, the shock was powerful and the blame and disgust seemed to be equally spread. But these last few days when Lady Blackburn’s affair with Southwater became public? Sympathies have strongly shifted to Lord Blackburn. I think if he were to engage in an affair with you, it certainly wouldn’t hurt him. And I suppose that a few well-placed whispers could only help.”
“Well-placed whispers?” Evelina repeated. “Such as?”
“People will ask me about it, as our relationship is not secret,” Caroline said. “They always ask me about you three. And I can say how both of you were wronged and are taking comfort in each other. How he’s helping you when you were so cruelly abandoned. How much he deserves a little pleasure after being so strong and kind during the worst betrayal. In the end, it might actually limit the damage being done to him in the public eye.”
Evelina took all that information in. It certainly gave an altruistic turn to what was otherwise an act of vengeance.
“I still have such a hard time believing Harry would be so abjectly cruel,” Julia said with a sigh and a frown.
“I don’t,” Silas said softly, and looked down the table at Evelina. She knew what he was thinking about, that night when she had begged Harry to help Silas find Arabella only to have him refuse for fear of a scandal.
And here he was, courting one ten times as terrible for some other woman. Her chest ached with that fact and she dropped her gaze back to her tart.
“Perhaps before I do anything to claim vengeance I should…I should talk to Harry,” she said softly.
That brought everyone’s silverware to clatter against their plates and when she looked up she found the table full of staring eyes and gaping mouths.
“You cannot mean that,” Arabella said first. “It cannot be wise.”
“I don’t care about wise, I care about safe,” Silas said.
Safe. There was something she’d always believed herself to be with Harry. She shook her head. “I-I cannot imagine Harry would bring me physical harm.”
“You couldn’t imagine a great many things, my dear,” Silas said, the words harsh but the tone gentle.
She shut her eyes. “He cannot be a complete monster. He cannot.”
“If you must see him, let me be with you when you do it,” Silas said. “I’ll stand by, I won’t interfere. I just want to be there in case.”
“Fine,” she said softly. “I’ll write to him and see if he’ll even meet with me and then ensure you are there to chaperone. But now I’m tired of lamenting my situation. Can we speak of something else? Aunt Caroline, do you have any interested gentlemen this Season?”
Her aunt’s cheeks darkened a shade, just as they always did when her nieces teased her about the subject of her love life. That was, of course, why they all did it. “Er. No.”
“That’s shame,” Arabella’s eyes danced with humor. “You deserve as much wicked fun as your nieces have!”
“You’re a widow, auntie,” Julia added with a laugh. “You could get away with so much.”
“I could arrange something for you. Simone would help, I’m sure,” Arabella continued.
Caroline covered her cheeks with her hands. “Lord, let us not involve Miss Stanhope. Please, this is too much, even if I know you’re all in jest. Can’t we talk about Julia’s new gentleman instead?”
The eyes of the table shifted to Evelina’s younger sister, who was blushing almost as darkly as their aunt. “Lord Castleton is a fine protector thus far. We attend the opera each week and supper at my place every other Thursday.”
“Sounds like a font of passion,” Arabella said with a roll of her eyes before she took a sip of her drink.
“Not everyone gets your fairytale ending,” Julia said. “And it’s fine enough for now.”
They continued their conversation, teasing each other, playful together as the sisters had always been. Silas and Caroline fit right in and for a moment Evelina felt peace. It was fleeting, of course, just as it had been for a flash of a moment two nights ago when she’d gripped Blackburn’s arm and felt the same.
Perhaps one day she’d get back to peace. But first she had to write a letter to Harry. Fully resolve things, understand him, and then walk away, perhaps without needing revenge for the wrongs he’d committed.
