She wrinkled her brow. “It is a generous sum, Mama. And one I fully control. I couldn’t ask for more.”
“You could,” her father insisted. “Or give us a larger portion of what you are given.”
She frowned. As demanded, she had given them two-thirds of her monthly allowance, which meant that after her purchases today, she had nothing left. How was one meant to obtain blood from a stone? Or did they expect her to have no pleasures of her own so they could maintain their lifestyle?
“I—” she began, but before she could finish, Roderick returned to the room. Once more, his mood had changed. His lips were pinched now, his gaze stormy even as he crossed to her and put a hand on her lower back once more.
“Stevenson tells me our supper is ready,” he said with a quick glare at her parents. “Why don’t we move to the dining room?”
He took her arm to lead the way and she looked up at him. “Is—is something wrong?” she asked softly.
He looked at her then, but just as quickly looked away. “I’m well, I assure you. We can discuss it more later, when we have privacy.”
She swallowed hard. What did that mean? What did they have to discuss? But there was no way to press him now. They entered the dining room and took their places at the table.
The night went as well as one could expect. Roderick erased whatever reaction he had from his countenance, certainly her parents didn’t recognize anything was wrong. Only every once in a while did Clarissa notice him watching her, his lips thin as if with displeasure.She had done something wrong and the panic that rose in her was almost overwhelming. Why, she couldn’t say. They didn’t have a love match, after all. She had no doubt that even if he decided he didn’t like her anymore that he would take care of her. He was too gentlemanly to do anything different.
But the idea that he would draw himself away from her felt harder than it should, regardless of any safety he continued to provide. She liked being near him, it turned out. Too much, perhaps. Enough that she was endangering herself with silly emotions.
Supper ended at last and her parents insisted on playing a game of cards after. Clarissa could barely manage herself as she sat across from Roderick and felt the wall between them while she poorly played cards and caused them to lose to her crowing parents.
Eventually, though, her parents moved to the door and they said their goodbyes. Her father leaned in as he said farewell and whispered, “If you care about your parents, after all we did for you, you will find a way to give more.”
She drew in a long breath and nodded slowly before she kissed her mother’s cheek and she and Roderick stepped out to wave their carriage away into the night. When they were gone, it was like a weight was lifted from her chest. So odd, since she had never realized she felt that way around them until she was in her own home, with a man who seemed to value her autonomy as much as her opinions or company.
“Would you like to come to the parlor for a drink or go to our chamber?” Roderick asked, his tone still rather tight. So it wasn’t just her parents who had caused the shift.
She faced him. “I find myself tired. Perhaps our chamber is best.”
At least they would have privacy there if he decided to declare their marriage one in name only until he wished to produce an heir with her. To her surprise, he held out a hand. She stared at the long, lean fingers that had brought her so much pleasure over the last week and finally took it.
They were silent as they went up the stairs together, down thelong hallway, into their chamber. He didn’t stop at the antechamber, but took her into his room, as usual. She worried her lip as the tension between them increased with every move. When he shut the door, he leaned against it and watched her. She fought not to respond, just to wait. Let him make the first move. Not ask for too much when she wanted to beg for just that.
Finally, he drew in a long breath and said, “Tell me what your parents have compelled you to do with your pin money.”
Clarissa’s mouth fell open at the order and for a moment all her limbs went numb. She shifted. “I-I don’t know what you mean.”
He shoved off the door and took a long step toward her. “Clarissa.” His dark green eyes held her, unwavering, unrelenting. “Tell me. Now.”
When Roderick had left Clarissa with her parents before supper to read Brightly’s note, he had been nervous, but excited. He was arranging for some changes to the countess chamber at Stratford Manor. A way to surprise her and start to inject some of her personality into their home. When he’d returned, though, when he’d overheard her father demanding she share more of her pin money with him, when he’d realized she’d already turned over a good sum of it to her parents, his good mood had changed.
What he’d wanted to do in that moment was burst into the room, have it out with her greedy parents, come to her defense and burn the world down if need be. It had taken all his control not to do so, to wait so that he could have a private conversation with her, rather than involve her awful parents. This was between them, after all.
Now she was shifting from one foot to the other, wringing her hands before her, unable to meet his gaze. He saw her anxiety in every twitch of her cheek, her upset in the tremble of her hands.
“I-I—” she stammered, her voice wavering.
He took another step toward her and softened his tone and expression. “Please, Clarissa.”
She lifted her eyes to his at theplease. She almost seemed shocked by his gentleness. Which meant she deserved it all the more. But when he reached for her, she pivoted and paced away, around the bed so that it became a barrier between them. She fiddled with items on her bedside table, touched the book under the candle there.
“It’s my money, isn’t it?” she asked.
He supposed she meant that question to be tart, and it was on some level. It reminded him of how they had begun weeks and weeks ago on her parents’ estate. When they had been enemies, rivals. But unlike then, he knew her now. He could see the pain in her eyes, hear the embarrassment in her tone. Her armor could be pierced now. He wanted to make it so she never had to wear it again.
“Yes,” he said softly. “The money is yours to do with as you wish.”
“Then why interrogate me?” she asked, and threw up her hands. “You obviously overheard something that wasn’t meant for your ears.”
