CHAPTER21
Callum was feeling cautiously optimistic.Valaria had stayed the night with him…then another…and then a third.And now she sat at his breakfast table, reading his paper, looking so lovely and natural there that it made his heart ache.
Thiswas the future they could share.Wouldshare once her mourning was officially over and they could be wed.The future they would share now, quietly together, privately bound in their hearts, even if they could not be in the eyes of the law.
And he would have been only optimistic and not cautious if he didn’t still feel the remnants of her hesitation.Oh yes, she curled herself into him, spent the long nights in his bed exploring passion, becoming more attuned to him, just as he did with her.She spent longer afternoons reading with him or talking about everything and nothing all at once.
They were becoming closer with every passing hour, but she was still holding back.Sometimes she started to tell him something, but stopped herself.He saw her fear.He saw her pain.
And he could only hope that the longer they were together, the more he could prove that he was trustworthy and true.That she could give him her heart, her soul, her secrets, without fear of recrimination or whatever abuse she’d suffered at the hands of Silas.
“You suddenly look very serious, Your Grace,” she said without looking up from the paper.
“You can tell that with your nose buried in the news?”he teased.“You are so aware of me?”
Now she did glance up.“You know I am aware of you.Always,” she said.“You make it impossible not to be, the way you fill every room you’re ever in.”
He chuckled.“How boorish of me.”
She smiled in return.“Very discourteous, I agree.”She tilted her head and her smile faded.“Is something troubling you?”she asked.
He shook his head.“How could anything trouble me when we’ve had such a perfect few days together?”
She worried her lip.“It has been wonderful,” she admitted softly.“I hate to see it end.”
“Does it have to?”
She glanced up at him.“I cannot stay here forever, Callum.Not yet, at any rate.I must go back to Kent’s Row and at least maintain some semblance of my prior life.Flora and Bernadette will expect to see me later today at the very least.Fanny brought me the invitation to join them for tea when she went home last night to fetch my dress for today.”
“And so you will run away,” he said.“Will you come back?”
She shifted.“You make it impossible not to.”She reached across the table and covered her hand with his.“Why don’t you come with me today?I could request that the duchesses join me at my home instead of at Flora’s.We could invite Theo.It would be a very happy fivesome.”
He smiled at the fact that she wasn’t entirely pushing him away.“I would love that.Yes.”
“Wonderful!Let’s finish eating and I’ll write a little note to the ladies and to Theo about the change of plans.I’m certain they will be just as pleased with that as anything else.Then Fanny can gather my things and we can return to Kent’s Row together.”
He stared at her, this woman who had lit up his world so entirely.And he wished with all his heart that he could do the same for her someday.
“You could write your note to the duchesses andIcould invite Theo,” he suggested.“And then with our chores done, we could go back up to my chamber.”
She arched a brow.“And what would we do in your chamber, Your Grace?”she teased.
He locked his gaze with hers.“Well, I could find at least five or six different ways to distract you from all your plans one more time.”
A smile fluttered across her face and she nodded.“An excellent notion.Let’s do just that.”She cleared her throat.“But…but after the tea with our friends, before you return home, or decide to distract me as you do again…I do want to talk to you about something.Something serious.”
He nodded slowly, even though his heart lurched at that statement.“Yes.If you’re ready to do so, I would love to hear whatever you would say.”
Her breath left her lips on a shaky sigh.“I hope that will be true,” she said.She shook her head and got up.“I’ll go write my message and meet you in the bedroom shortly.”
She leaned down to kiss his temple and then slipped from the room.He watched her go, his heart throbbing, and hoped…prayed…that whatever would happen today would make them stronger, not tear them apart.
* * *
Valaria’s head spun as Callum’s carriage ferried them onto her drive back at Kent’s Row.It had only been a few days since she was last home, but it felt like a lifetime now.She felt…different.The time in his home, in his arms, had felt like a moment stolen from time, a place where she could picture a future she’d never dared to hope for and forget everything she feared.
But now those fears came back.Those worries about what Callum would say when he knew the truth about her and what she’d done.
