CHAPTER2
Although Valaria had fretted about her tea with Bernadette and Flora after she’d settled in the day before, it turned out there was no reason.She sat in Flora’s parlor the following afternoon and felt…well, it was almost relaxed.Not entirely, but something close to it.
And she could admit, at least to herself, that it wasn’t a feeling she’d had in a very long time.It helped that the two women were such good friends and that they could be talkative.In the span of an hour, Valaria had come to realize that though Bernadette was the oldest of their little threesome, she was also the most innocent.She blushed easily and would steer the topic away from points of discomfort if she saw them.
Flora, on the other hand, was breezy and open and playful.She made no secret the fact that she had been very happy in her marriage to the late Duke of Sidmouth, despite their vast thirty-year age difference.She smiled warmly when she spoke of him and seemed to have no regrets whatsoever.
Valaria tried not to hate her for that.
“We’ve prattled on for so long,” Bernadette said at last, and reached across to grab Valaria’s hand for a brief squeeze.“Tell us about yourself.”
Valaria shifted and withdrew her hand slowly.“I’m not sure what there is to tell that you wouldn’t already know.I’m a…a very recent widow, only a couple of months.My husband died in an accident.”She swallowed.“A tragic accident.”
“I recall when it happened,” Flora said, her expression truly stricken.“I cannot imagine.And you found him?I’m so very sorry.”
Valaria felt herself go a little numb as shifted into the responses she had trained herself to give over the last eight weeks.“Thank you.”
Bernadette’s brow wrinkled slightly, and for a moment she stared at Valaria.A little too hard, like she could see something Valaria didn’t wish to share.Then she smiled.“Certainly we are far more than our pasts or husbands.Will you tell us of your likes?Your pursuits?”
That should have been a kinder topic.Valaria could see she meant it as one, and yet the pressure in her chest only seemed to increase.The fact was, she didn’t have an answer.The last two years of her life since her marriage she had been…isolated.Her movements watched and judged, her pursuits limited and spoiled by the reactions of a man who…
No.She cut that thought off in her mind.She was not going down that path, not in front of these women who were practically strangers.She couldn’t risk the reaction those thoughts sometimes created.
She forced a smile instead.“Oh, I think I’m fairly typical in my pursuits.I do needlepoint and read.”
Flora tilted her head.“Do I recall you being proficient in…what instrument was it…oh Lord, why can’t I recall?Everyone used to talk about how beautifully you played.”
The reaction Valaria had been trying to avoid overwhelmed her and she blinked at the tears that filled her eyes.“The harp-lute.Yes, I once played.But I…I stopped.”
“That’s a shame,” Flora said.“Bernadette is wonderful on the pianoforte.”
“She is too kind.I am passable on the pianoforte.I never practice enough,” Bernadette insisted with a smile.
Flora shot her a look before she continued, “And I sing.”She hesitated.“Though I would not say well.”
Bernadette laughed, but Valaria could sense the other woman reading her again.“Well, it is best we do not make a triplet, then.No use frightening the poor servants.”She pushed to her feet.“Flora, speaking of reading, I have that book I borrowed from you.I finished it last night.We could go fetch it.”
Flora’s brow knitted.“I…fetch it now?Could that not wait?”
“I will forget if I don’t return it to you now,” Bernadette insisted with a meaningful stare.
Valaria swallowed.This was her opportunity for the escape she found herself craving.She got to her feet, as well.“You know, I should get back to my home.We are still settling in and there is much to be decided and worked on that requires my input.”
“Of course, we understand,” Bernadette said.“But I hope we will regularly make time to be together.There is a vast difference between being a young widow and a widow of advancing years.And though I do love our older neighbors and I hope we’ll have a gathering soon where you can meet them all, I think I see a kindred spirit in you, Valaria.A person I’d love to call friend.”
Valaria caught her breath at the genuine expression of welcome and acceptance on both the women’s faces.She’d almost forgotten what that felt like.She nodded slowly.“I-I would very much like that.”
Flora’s wide smile was instantaneous and she caught both of Valaria’s hands briefly.“Excellent news.Come, let us see you out.”
Valaria allowed it, and after she’d waved her goodbyes, she could feel the two women watching her as she made her way back down the lane toward her own door.There was relief in the meeting ending.She was not yet fully trusting of her own reactions to people after so long separating herself.
And yet…there had been something so lovely about the time spent.It was certainly impossible not to like the two dowager duchesses, and to feel welcomed into their little circle.They had painted a picture for her of a future of friendship.Independence.A future where she might be, dare she hope, happy?
She found herself smiling at the idea as she turned into her drive, but the expression fell at what she found there.A carriage was parked before her door and she recognized the crest emblazed on the side.Blackvale.Which could only mean that Silas’s best friend, the Duke of Blackvale, had come to call.
Without sending word ahead of his intention, of course.Without giving her a chance to say no.Because men like him, like her husband, they didn’t think of these things.They didn’t care.
She lifted her chin and stiffened her spine, hoping she could control the sudden pounding of her heart so he would not see her weakness and pounce upon it.She moved toward the door, but before she could reach it, it opened and Blackvale, himself, stepped out with Higgins at his heels.
