His voice cracked as he asked and she staggered beneath the weight of the question.There must have been something on her face, in the soft sound of pain she couldn’t keep from her lips, that told him the answer because his entire countenance collapsed for a brief moment.Grief and guilt, pain and anger all at once.
She gathered herself.It would do no good to deny what he could already see, it seemed.Which meant she would have to address this with another tactic entirely.What exactly that was, she needed time to determine.
“I don’t think the park is the place to discuss this.”
He blinked and looked around.“Of course.I apologize, Your Grace.My home is but a short walk away.Might we go there, share tea and perhaps talk about this there?”He lifted a hand to his chest.“If you do not wish to do so, I understand.And I would never…never force you to do so.But I am…I am undone by this realization.”
She could see that was true.This man who had loved her husband, a love Silas had never deserved, did seem truly crushed by the implication of these facts of him.She could only imagine what he might think if he knew the rest.But he couldn’t.Not ever.
“I…I understand,” she said softly.“My carriage is on the other side of the park.Perhaps I could return to it and then meet you at your home?”
“Yes,” he said.“It is but a short distance on the circle path back.I’ll take you there and then ride back on Fox.You can follow.”
She agreed and they made their way back to her carriage with lighter conversation.Still, she couldn’t help but think about what she might say to him as he helped first her into her carriage and then Fanny.He said goodbye, his gaze focused too intently on her as they rode off toward his house.
“It is not my place, I know, but I’m shocked you would not simply deny to that man that your late husband was the bastard he was,” Fanny said, her tone sharp and worried.
Valaria looked at her maid.It was a good reminder that she wasn’t the only one in danger in these moments.She had others to protect, as well.“He saw the truth.If I had denied it, it would only have made him more suspicious.I can tell him half-truths now, control the narrative.And find…find some way to distract him so he doesn’t dig further.”
“He’s already distracted when it comes to you,” Fanny said.
Valaria sucked in a breath at the implication.“That’s an impertinent thought, Fanny.”
Her maid arched a brow.“Is it?He wants you.Anyone could see it written all over his face the way he watches you.You must know it, too.”
Valaria flinched.“I…I do know it,” she whispered, thinking of the warm weight of his lips on hers.Thinking of the electric jolt that hit her when he touched her or looked at her through that hooded glance.
“Then you know how dangerous that could be,” Fanny insisted, a little desperation entering her voice.
Shutting her eyes, Valaria pondered that.Yes, being close to Callum was dangerous.She wasn’t so foolish as to pretend it didn’t open doors that perhaps were better shut.But when he was close to her, touching her, he didn’t ask her about anything else, did he?He didn’t press her about other topics best left unbroached.
Wasn’t there power in that?
“But what if his desire could…could play into our favor?”
She hated herself for saying it.For thinking it.It sullied the kiss they’d shared.It made her a person that would use another’s emotions or desires against them.Like Silas always had.
“I can’t believe you would think that,” Fanny breathed.“Riskthat.After everything else.”
Everything else.Yes, surely Valaria couldn’t forget everything else.She shuddered.
“Well, hopefully it won’t come to that,” Valaria said as they stopped on his drive.
Now she would have to go inside and find some way to tell a man who looked at her like she was precious that a man he’d loved had thought her worthless.And she had no idea what that conversation would lead to.For better or for worse.
