“No.” Richard rushed to her, holding her up just as he had in the parlor when the investigator’s interest had first been revealed.
Relief flowed through her and she rested her head on his shoulder. She smelled Hux on him and she breathed the scent in. Richard’s hand came up to smooth her hair and he said, “Come back down with me, Zara. We’ll talk to him together.”
She lifted her head. “And what if we can’t convince him?”
A little smile tilted Richard’s lips. “Then we’ll tie him up in the attic until we can save him.”
That image elicited a laugh from her, even though she was still tense with fear and worry. Hux would be furious to be held captive, even for his own good. And yet she would risk his wrath, even his hatred, if she could save him.
“I’lltalk to him,” she said with a sigh. “As long as you stand by with the rope.”
Richard wiped a tear from her cheek with his thumb and then leaned forward. His mouth was warm against hers, gentle. Soothing. When they parted, he took her arm and together they walked from the room, down the main stair and back into the parlor.
Hux was sprawled on the settee, just as mussed as Richard looked, and she rolled her eyes. It seemed Richard had tried passion to convince him. It didn’t look like it had worked.
Hux got up as she came closer. He stared at her like he was seeing her for the first time, and she released Richard and moved to him. She wrapped her arms around him, and for what seemed like an eternity, they just held each other. There were no words. No words were needed. She just felt him and his heartbeat and it made her feel safe.
At least for the time being. But at last he leaned back. “Zara,” he began.
“If you are going to say anything after my name that involves you leaving me, then you can save your breath,” Zara said.
Hux cupped her cheeks. “You have to let me go,” he whispered, his breath warm on her lips. “I was never forever for you.”
“That is shite and you know it,” she snapped. “Why in the world would you think that?”
“Because you are lovely and intelligent and suited for far above a station than mine. When you were broken and bruised, I know it was helpful to come down to where I live, who I am, and never expect more. But you were always more and I always knew that one day you would remember that.”
Her heart throbbed at that complete dismissal of what he had been to her. And her sudden understanding of how he viewed himself…why he never let her too close. She knew about his life, his past. It had taken years to hear it, to ease it out of him, but this man had suffered greatly. And it broke her heart to know he felt unworthy of her when in truth he was the person she admired and needed most in this world.
“Hux,” she whispered.
He shook his head, still determined. “I was a time for you, but perhaps he…” He looked at Richard over her shoulder. “…is your future.”
She tugged away from him, recoiling once more. “No,” she said. “What part ofnodon’t you understand? I won’t leave you.”
“Because you love him.”
Richard said those words, quietly and calmly from behind her. Zara nearly stumbled hearing them. Things she had felt but feared to say because of the past.Becauseof what she knew about who Hux was and what he’d been through. Because if he didn’t love her back it would destroy her.
But losing him would do that too. And perhaps her fear had been her greatest failing.
She drew a deep breath and met Hux’s eyes. Lost herself in him for a moment, just as she wished to do for the rest of her life. “Because I love you,” she repeated. “I love you, Peregrine Huxley.”
If she hoped that confession would bring joy to his handsome face, it elicited the opposite response. Hux’s expression crumpled and he moved away from her, pacing to the nearly chair and leaning heavily against its back with both hands.
“Don’t love me, Zara,” he murmured at last. “Not now. Not when you could be with someone who—”
He cut himself off and Zara realized in that moment that he wasn’t about to make some excuse about the danger he was in due to the investigation. This denial was about that, yes, but also something deeper.
“What?” she demanded. “Respect me enough to finish the sentence, Hux.”
He lifted his chin, defiant and beautiful, even as he made his face hard. “You could be with someone who makes this so easy.”
Her mouth dropped open. Wasthatwhat he saw when he looked at her with Richard? That it was easy after such a struggle in their beginning? Did he see how she surrendered to this other man and decide that meant she wanted him more? That she could give something Hux couldn’t take?
She moved toward him, long certain steps. He gripped the chair back even harder, his knuckles going white, but he didn’t recoil. He didn’t move away.
“If it is easy with Richard, it is because of you.”
