“Not because he died in a spot like that one, no. You see, one more thing Imogen and I ended up having in common was that we were left destitute by our husbands. Her because Huxley’s family ripped her inheritance out from under her. Me because Lovell settled me with nothing.”
“I’m sorry,” Nicholas said, and she could tell he was being sincere. Hewassorry, even though this wasn’t his fault. Not truly.
“I was too,” she said. “But I was luckier. I had my family that loves me.”
“More than loves you, I hope,” Nicholas said softly.
She tilted her head. “Do you pretend you don’t know how poorly my father handled his estates? That Thomas has been overwhelmed by debt and shame since the last earl’s death a few years ago? Your father must have mentioned it.”
Nicholas glanced away. “It’s come up in passing. My father is a professional, though. He would never give details. I wasn’t aware it was so terrible.”
She shrugged and hoped that covered some of the pain this conversation caused. She didn’t want his pity. Or to have him believe this story was some kind of manipulation meant to make him help her. “Well, because it is so terrible, I have been loath to involve my brother overly much. He can barely manage things for himself. I keep most of the particulars of my situation quiet.”
“You protect him,” he said.
“And I wanted to protect Imogen, but her situation was something else entirely. She had no family left, no help of any kind. And she’s such an independent spirit. She decided she would take a lover, as many women of our situation do.”
Nicholas arched a brow and his gaze flitted over her. She blushed. She hadn’t thought of tonight as taking a lover, not in that sense. But of course she had. The lover was just the love of her life. Still and always and forever, her foolish heart be damned.
She pushed that aside, for it would do her no good to feel it, and said, “Because of her husband’s awful family, she couldn’t hunt for a lover in more…elevated places. They threatened to take her home, to eliminate everything she had left. So she started going to worse places looking for a protector.”
“The Cat’s Companion isn’t where you find a protector,” he said. “Men go there for a night of pleasure, nothing more.”
She shivered. “I told her that, but she was so desperate. She was convinced that if she just pleased the right man the right way, she could still convince him to take her on as his mistress. She had a frightening experience one night—” She cut herself off as she tried not to think of Imogen’s story. Of how Imogen had barely escaped that horrible place with her life. “And I begged her not to go back there.”
“But she did.”
Aurora nodded. “She did, and I got word of it, and I…I tried to find her. But she has vanished. I’ve been searching far and wide for her. That night at the Cat’s Companion was the culmination of my search, but…butIwas found out instead, and now I’m no good to Imogen at all because the world is watching and judging me.”
His expression softened and he nodded slowly. “I owe you an apology.”
She drew back. “Why?”
“I assumed I understood the story of why you’d go to such a place.” His brow wrinkled. “It makes me wonder what else I have misjudged.”
“You thought I’d gone there for pleasure?” she asked.
He nodded.
“Some of the bawdy houses were…titillating, I admit,” she whispered, feeling her cheeks warm. “But some were just frightening. That last one was very frightening.”
His jaw set. “I’m gutted you had to go through that alone. I wish…I wish I could have been there.”
She tilted her head, those words sinking into her skin and her heart and her soul.Therewas the man she’d known all those years ago. He’d been hiding from her, just peeking out now and then. But now he was truly there, looking into her eyes, his kindness and his compassion on full display.
“You and I have been estranged for so long, I wouldn’t have thought to come to you,” she said slowly. “But if I had, I know you would have helped me even if you…even if you hated me like it seemed you did when I first arrived here. Because you’re you, Nicholas, and you have always been so good.”
“I’m not as sure about that. But perhaps I can help you now. Derrick—er, Huntington—runs an investigative service, you know. He might be able to help you find your friend. He’s very trustworthy. Your story and hers would be safe with him.”
She hadn’t expected this offer and leaned in to rest her hand on his chest. “I appreciate it and I may take you up on it later. But when Katherine came to me, she offered me help from their friend in the War Department. He’s looking for Imogen now. I’m hoping when I return that he’ll have more information on the matter and I can work with him to find her at last.”
“Ah.” He nodded, and she thought she saw a flash of something dark in his eyes as he bent his head. “Well, I’m glad of it. You’ll be safe with someone who works for the Crown.”
“I worry more about her than me,” she admitted with a sigh.
“Of course you do,” he said with a faint smile. “You are you.”
She tilted her head because he was watching her so intently and there were so many emotions on his face. As if there could still be something between them. And though she had put those dreams away a long time ago, she couldn’t help but feel them sparked by his expression. By the way his fingers flexed against her skin.
