He shook his head slowly. What she’d come for. Sex. The ridding of that pesky virginity she and her ilk put so much value upon. She’d come here to be…God, he could think of so many things he wanted to do to her. For her. With her.
And he couldn’t do a damned one of them. He wasn’t worthy of what he’d already taken, let alone more.
“You want this?” he asked, forcing his tone to lower, slowing it, narrowing his gaze as he held hers. “You want what you see out in those halls? You want what you read about in some sad little book your father hid? You want to be debased and debauched and ruined?”
She didn’t flinch, but instead her pupils dilated. “Yes,” she whispered, her voice rough. “You say those things to frighten me, as if you think I’m some fool who doesn’t understand them. I may not be so versed in the ways of the world as you are, Mr. Maitland. I may not be jaded and experienced. But I know what I want. You can’t scare me away by shouting and blustering and trying to name it. Naming it only makes the ache…” She dropped her chin. “Worse.Youonly make the ache worse.”
Ellis was on fire. His blood burned, flowing through his body like lava. He wanted this woman so badly it physically hurt.
“Juliana,” he whispered as he stepped toward her. She trembled as he did so, looking up at him through those stunning pale green eyes. With a sigh, he hooked his fingers beneath her mask and pulled it away, tossing it aside.
“You are…” She was struggling to find the words, but she never backed down. “I know you only give if you can get something in return. You bargain and barter when it comes to…to this.”
He flinched but didn’t deny her. After all, that was a good summary of the transactional nature of most love games he’d played over the years.
“I’m not expecting to be different,” she continued. Her voice was shaking, her hands were shaking, but she didn’t stop. That strength drew him in. That strength made his own knees quake.
“No?” he pressed. “Whatdoyou expect?”
“You’re determined not to see me do what I want to do with the strangers I might encounter in this place,” she said. She drew a long breath before she continued. “So I…I’m asking to do it with you. I wantyouto be the one to give me what I need. And in return I’ll…give you something you need.”
Ellis had been standing so close to Juliana, but the moment she made her offer, he backed up, spun around, paced to the fire. His back was still to her and she saw his shoulders lifting as he took deep breaths. Was he offended? Amused? Shocked?
She had no idea. How she hated that he was so good at hiding all reactions and emotions unless it suited him to show those things.
She folded her arms and waited, determined not to beg for what she’d already asked for. The clock ticked on the mantel, taunting her with each passing second as they collected and mocked her.
At last he faced her. His handsome face was still unreadable. “What do you think Ineed, Juliana?”
“In the carriage, you said you wanted me,” she whispered. “ there is that, though I don’t have any illusions that you couldn’t satisfy your desires with a dozen other more experienced women.”
“A dozen women,” he said with a half-smile. “You overestimate my prowess.”
She clenched her teeth. “Mock me all you want, you know what I meant. I’m just saying that if my body isn’t enough to tempt you, I could…” She pushed her shoulders back. “I know you’re still looking for Winston Leonard. So are Rook and Harcourt. I can share their information.”
Ellis’s eyes went wide, and for the first time since she’d met him weeks ago, he actually looked…surprised. Was it possible she’d shocked the most jaded man she’d ever met? It seemed so.
He moved toward her. “You would betray the husbands of your sisters just so that I’d open your legs?”
She flinched at the crude way he put it. “It isn’t a betrayal. The three of you are trying to find the man for the same purpose, to stop his threats against all of us. To bring him to justice for what he’s done and what he’s capable of doing still.”
Ellis’s lips thinned, and for a brief but powerful moment, she saw sadness in his eyes. A heartbreak so real and so pure that it made her own chest ache at the sight. She moved toward him. “Ellis, what is wrong?”
He stared at her. “You’ve never called me by my given name before.”
She swallowed. She always referred to him as Ellis in her head. In her dreams. But she’d kept herself from being so informal when in the same space with him. To be so felt…dangerous.
Just as everything about this man was dangerous.
“Do you want me to stop?” she whispered.
He chuckled, and the sound seemed to enter her bloodstream and wend its way through her entire body. How could he affect her so without even touching her?
“No. Ellis is better than Mr. Maitland, by far,” he said. “And there is nothing wrong. You’re right, we all have the same end in mind when it comes to that bastard. To see him pay for what he’s done.”
“Then I won’t be hurting anyone by sharing what I see and hear and know,” she said, repeating the way she’d justified this plan in her head on the way here.
“Only yourself,” he murmured.
