She shifted and hissed out a small sound of discomfort. Her body wasn’t used to what they’d just done, and it was telling her all about it.
He frowned even more deeply than he had a moment before. “They’re likely preparing a bath in the dressing room even as we speak,” he said. “After I finish eating, I’ll check. The warm water will help with the pain.”
She wrinkled her brow as she examined him closely. He was a dichotomy, that was certain. Hard and distant, but also caring and careful. Handsome but scarred. On the outside his scars were obvious, but there was something beyond that. Deeper than that.
“You arranged for a bath?” she asked.
He arched a brow. “Contrary to my appearance, I’m not a monster, Marianne. I recognize you may be feeling some discomfort.”
She swallowed hard and looked at his face closely. “You don’t look like a monster, Alexander. And after today, I do not think you are one in your heart, as gruff as you may try to be.”
“Don’t you?” he said slowly.
She heard the dangerous warning in his tone. She ignored it, even though the man made her nervous. Even though he held her future in his hands now.
“No,” she said, hating that her voice shook. “If you were a monster, you would not have been so…careful with me. You could have simply taken me and not given a thought to my pleasure. You didn’t.”
He was silent for what felt like an eternity, and then he leaned forward. “Wanting you to come is for my pleasure as much as yours. Don’t mistake yourself, Marianne—I do what I do for my own reasons.”
She frowned. He was pushing her away, that much was obvious. Although she should have allowed it, she saw something in his eyes in that moment. Pain. And it made her want to draw closer to him, despite his words.
“Losing your sister must have been very hard for you,” she said slowly.
He stiffened immediately and his gaze narrowed as he pushed his plate aside and got to his feet in one smooth motion.
“I do not speak of Anne,” he snapped. “Not to anyone.”
He walked away from her to the fire and leaned over the flames. The dancing light caressed his bare chest and she caught her breath. Wanting him came so naturally to her. Even in this moment where he was obviously putting a wall between them.
“I understand needing to shut yourself off from it,” she pressed, getting to her own feet and adjusting the blanket that covered her. “I lost my mother when I was fourteen. And then my father just weeks ago.”
He faced her, his arms folded across his chest. “It seems your father did not provide much for you other than scandal. Do you not feel like it is good riddance?”
She worried her lip as sadness rose up in her. “I admit I’m angry with him. I hate that his actions created the situation Juliet and I find ourselves in. But I loved my father, flaws and all. Just as I’m certain your sister loved you.”
He took a long step toward her. “I told you, I do not speak of my sister to anyone. Is that clear?”
His voice grew louder on the last few words, and she jumped at the raw pain and anger in his voice and on his face. In that moment, he looked and sounded like the monster he kept trying to convince her that he was. And yet she still didn’t feel like backing away from him.
She nodded slowly. “I understand you, Your Grace.”
He stood perfectly still for a moment, holding her stare, struggling, it seemed, to find a way back to the illusion of control that he showed to the world. Then he nodded once. “Very good. I shall go check on your bath.”
With that, he turned on his heel and stalked away, leaving her alone. Leaving her with the realization that beneath his anger and his swagger and his coldness was something dark and deep. Something she wasn’t certain she should dare to explore.
No matter how much she was tempted to do so.
Chapter Seven
Marianne shifted in the carriage seat and let out a small sigh.
“You must be uncomfortable, miss.”
She jolted at her maid’s words. She kept forgetting Bonnie was even in the carriage with her, her mind was so tangled. But Alexander had insisted he ride outside the vehicle on horseback when they left the inn early that morning. So Bonnie had been taken from the other carriage and placed with her to keep her company.
And Marianne had been distracted and confused ever since.
“It’s just been a long few days,” she admitted. “I’m fine.”
