“It was such a strong reaction,” Kit whispered. “Like someone had reached into my chest and was tearing my heart in two. I’ve spent years telling myself I do not like this woman and yet when I thought I would lose her, I felt only regret.”
Matthew’s brow wrinkled, but before he could say anything in response, Lucas entered the room. Like Matthew and Kit, he had also changed out of his wet clothing. They rose together, and Kit stepped forward.
“Thank you,” he said.
Lucas tilted his head. “Of course. I’m just glad I had the training to be of some assistance.”
Matthew gripped his hands at his sides. “What was that?”
Lucas looked at their friend and Kit saw the same concern he felt. The same acknowledgement that when it came to this subject, Matthew was not going to be capable of rational response.
“Matthew—”
“Could I have done the same and savedherlife?”
Lucas reached out and gripped his arm. “The training is not common. I learned it from a boat captain just a few years ago while on assignment for the War Department. Diana and I have discussed it and altered it over time. There was no way you could have known to try such a thing in your situation. And you’ve told me about it before. Angelica was much farther away, your lake was larger. Honestly, a few more moments and it is possible I could not have saved Sarah. There was nothing you could have done, Matthew. Look at me.”
Matthew was shaking and he met their friend’s eyes slowly. “Yes?”
“There wasnothingyou could have done,” Lucas repeated.
As Matthew relaxed a fraction, the door to the parlor opened again, and this time it revealed Phoebe and Adelaide. Immediately Kit dropped to his knees and opened his arms. His sister rushed to him, burying her face in his shoulder as he rocked her gently.
“Come,” Lucas said, slinging an arm around Matthew gently. “Let the siblings reunite and I’ll teach you the method.”
“Yes,” Matthew said, and the two joined Adelaide in the hallway and closed the door behind themselves.
Kit swept his sister up and carried her over to the settee. He sat down, adjusting her in his lap, and couldn’t help but smile. She was getting so big—it seemed like she was all arms and legs now. And he would get to see her grow up, thanks to Sarah and his friends.
“I’m sorry, Kit.” Phoebe’s voice was muffled against his shoulder and he reached up to smooth her hair. It was still damp, and he shuddered a little at the memories that brought back.
“I know you are, poppin,” he said. “It was an accident—you didn’t mean to flip the boat.”
She lifted her face from his shoulder and stared up at him. Her brown eyes were wide and still filled with unshed tears. “I didn’t.”
“Shall we discuss what happened?” he asked softly, fighting to keep his voice firm but kind when all he wanted to do was cuddle her close and forget about what had happened that day.
“I was upset.”
“Yes,” he said. “You were throwing a tantrum.”
She glanced away, a furtive and guilty stare. “I got up in the boat.”
“Even though Papa told you many times that you shouldn’t do that,” Kit said. “Now you see why.”
She nodded quickly. “Yes. And then we were in the water. I was scared, Kit. It was cold.”
He hadn’t recalled that fact, but now it rushed back. The icy grip of the water swirling around him as he raced to his sister and her governess.
“Miss Sarah saved you, along with Matthew,” he said.
“She held me up in the water,” Phoebe said solemnly. “She wouldn’t let me go under like she did.” She shifted. “Kit, is Miss Sarah hurt?”
“No, Amelia reported that she was fine. We are very lucky that Lucas knew how to breathe air back into her lungs.” He snuggled her closer. “She’s resting now. And I think you should do the same after we’re done talking.”
Her face crumpled, but to his surprise she didn’t argue. Apparently the day’s events had taken some of the starch from her.
“Phoebe, just because you don’t mean for something to happen, just because it was an accident, doesn’t mean that you don’t have responsibility,” he said carefully. “I know it’s hard right now. You miss Papa. So do I.”
