“Yes, there is that,” he said at last. “But it is something I must do at some point, isn’t it? I do have obligations when it comes to my position. And I cannot imagine ever finding another person who challenges me or interests me or drives me as you do. Another person who I would feel comfortable telling my secrets to. Or a person whose secrets I, too, would wish to hold. If that is marriage, couldn’t we be happy together?”
Once again she was torn. What he described sounded like it could be a happy life. And yet it wasn’t enough. Because she wanted his heart. Now that she recognized it, she had never wanted anything more.
And yet she couldn’t say that. Couldn’t tell him that or he would run as surely as a spooked filly. What he offered was far more than she could ever hope to find. And perhaps, with time, it could become the thing she wanted most from him.
“Court me,” she repeated, letting the words roll over her tongue.
He nodded. “Yes.”
“Where are you two?” They both jolted as James’s voice carried through the woods toward them.
“Perfect timing, as always, has my friend James,” Robert said with a laugh and a roll of his eyes.
She smiled even though her heart ached, both a happy and empty pain. “We have been gone a long time—they probably think we’re doing something very wicked out here.”
“We should have done instead,” he retorted.
She stared up at him, seeing the core of his spirit in his eyes in a way she never had before. She shook her head. “No, we did exactly what we ought to have done. I’m glad you talked to me about your mother. And as for courting—”
“Katherine! Robert?” James’s voice came again.
Robert furrowed his brow. “We’re just returning, go find something else to do,” he shouted out into the general direction of the voice. “As for courting…?” he encouraged her gently.
She smiled. “Yes.”
His eyes went wide. “Yes?”
She nodded. “Yes.”
His entire impossibly handsome face lit up and her heart warmed at the sight. Whatever else he did not, or could not, feel for her, he did seem truly happy that she had accepted his attentions. Happy enough that she lifted up to her tiptoes and brushed her lips to his.
His arms came around her and he tugged her closer, the kiss transforming into something deeper and darker and more filled with promise. At last she pulled away.
“We’ll have to continue that later,” she whispered.
He let out a playfully put-upon sigh. “I count on it. Now come on, before he sends out a party to drag us back to propriety.”
He caught her arm and they walked back toward the group. And though Katherine was happy with what they had decided, happier than perhaps she’d ever thought she could be when she found Robert here at Emma and James’s party, there was still a nagging doubt in her chest.
Doubt about him. Doubt about herself. Doubt about any future they could have, especially when the past still felt so powerful.
Chapter Nineteen
Katherine pinched her cheeks and smiled at her reflection before she smoothed the skirts of her ballgown. As she did so, there was a light knock on her chamber door and then her aunt tucked her head around the barrier.
“Oh, you look lovely,” Bethany cooed.
Katherine pivoted to face her. “Thank you. The brocading on this gown is my very favorite,” she said. “Come in.”
Bethany entered the room and Katherine smiled. “And don’t you look lovely, too,” she said, admiring her aunt’s green gown, which brought out the highlights in her dark hair. The very same ones Katherine shared. “If you are not careful, you shall be mistaken for my sister, not my aunt, and some young man will sweep you into a scandalous affair.”
Bethany began to laugh. “I doubt that. At any rate, I think the limit is one scandalous affair per family, isn’t it?”
Katherine opened her mouth to deny the charge, but then threw up her hands. “I suppose there is no reason to deny it to you, Aunt Bethany. Robert and I are fairly obvious, I think, in our connection.”
“I’m glad you took my advice to have a little fun just for yourself,” Bethany said as she took a seat before Katherine’s fire and smiled up at her.
“I am, too,” Katherine said with a contented sigh. “The past week has been heavenly. I cannot believe we return to London tomorrow.”
