“Enough,” I snap, tossing my napkin down onto the table. “How dare you prompt an agenda using supper as a cover-up for your selfish reasons? We had plans with friends tonight, and you persuaded us to stay here so you wouldn’t have to eat alone. I can only imagine you must have told Lewis and James not to come home for a bit so you could take this time to make your move.”
“Elizabeth, pardon me, but I don’t think it’s necessary to be acting so irrational in front of our guest right now. Please, take your seat.”
“You cannot tell me what to do any longer, Dad. I am a grown woman and don’t deserve that type of treatment.” The discomfort displaying within Everett’s wide stare is a blatant plea for me to pause this conversation until a later point, but the words are flowing like a waterfall, and I’m not sure I can contain my anger any longer. “My decision concerning which position I will accept has no bearing on the weather or location. I will receive unique experiences in each hospital, and those are the facts I am focusing on.”
For the first time since I have been offered the positions, I notice an inflection of disdain glistening within Everett’s eyes. We have had conversations about what is best for each of us versus what would be wonderful for the two of us together. The decision has been impossible to make. I don’t want to leave Everett, nor my family, despite Dad’s behavior at the moment, but Boston would open up a new world of possibilities, new adventures, sights, and the reputation of those hospitals cannot be beat. Some might call me a fool for choosing any other place to begin my career.
“It’s not safe out on the East Coast right now, Elizabeth. I don’t know how else to make you understand. You act as though you live in a safe bubble here on this island because soldiers, sailors, and airmen surround you. What you don’t realize is what is awaiting outside of this island. You are a Jewish woman walking around in a world that sees us as the enemy. Anti-Semitism may not be as obvious here in the United States, but I promise you, even though the thoughts are quiet, they are present more than you can imagine.”
I place my palms down on the table, the friction causes a hollow thud louder than intended. “How is it that anti-Semitism is obvious to you but no one else? What do you know that I don’t?” I question, trying my best to keep my tone down.
“You heard what Lindbergh said just a few months ago. Maybe you aren’t aware of the uprising caused by his blame against the Jewish people for this war, but it exists in places you can’t see unless you are there. And I don’t want you there.”
I shake my head with utter disappointment. “There was a brawl in New York. It’s over. I can’t live in fear of an occurrence that has come and gone. It’s not fair to ask that of me and you know it.”
“Elizabeth, they were Nazi supporters. Aside from that, there is no one for you to go to if you find trouble on the East Coast. In another situation, at a different time, I would encourage you to spread your wings and fly, but I’ve already lost one love of my life, and I refuse to lose another. My job on earth is to keep you safe, and it is not safe outside of this base right now, despite what you assume.”
My heart pounds so hard, every bone in my body aches. This career path was supposed to be my decision, no one else’s.
“Sir, is something going on that we are unaware of?” Everett inquires.
Dad’s gaze falls to his half-empty plate of food. “No, we don’t know what tomorrow might bring. That’s all.” He isn’t looking Everett in the eyes. Dad doesn’t speak without making direct eye-contact. Not unless he’s lying.
“Elizabeth says the same, but with all due respect, Sir, if we don’t know what tomorrow might bring, why should we live in fear of the unknown?”
Dad’s face burns with a red hue, a distinct emotion I don’t recall seeing before. He drops his fork to the glass plate and the shattering clink echoes within the dangling crystals of the chandelier above our heads. He presses the napkin against his mouth and tosses it onto his plate. “Because I said so, dammit, that’s why.” With his final statements on the matter, Dad stands and retreats to his bedroom, then slams the door with unnecessary force.
“I think there might be something going on here,” Everett whispers.
I slap my hands down against my lap, frustrated beyond words. “Why, what do you mean?”
Everett folds his hands, resting them on the table as if to display a sense of calm while I’m foaming at the mouth. “I’m not sure, but I’ll see what I can do about finding out.”
Dad got his way. He spoiled the night for us all. “We will need to postpone our breakfast plans for tomorrow morning now, I assume?” It’s hard to force a sense of cheer after such a mortifying scene, but I feel like all my opportunities of joy become stolen in some way or another.
Everett places his hand on top of mine. “No, of course not. I wouldn’t miss the opportunity for anything in the world, gorgeous. Meet me outside at zero six hundred hours tomorrow morning, and we’ll go.”
His agreement to keep our plans almost helps me forget about the fit we just witnessed, but I doubt my mind will rest easy tonight while stewing on each word Dad said. “I’m looking forward to the morning, then.”
I pause for a moment, preparing to clear the plates, but an unsettling shadow falls over my shoulders, weighing me down to the seat. “Everett, is there any truth to what he said?” I turn to face him, needing to see the answer within his eyes.
He lifts my hand and holds it between his, offering me warmth and comfort, a gesture to ease the blow of whatever he has to say next. “I’m not exactly sure, Lizzie. A lot is going on in the world right now, and it’s hard to assume the safety of anyone’s location. You know I’m not the one who will hold you back from fulfilling your desires, but if the question is about safety, I can’t say I disagree with your father.”
“So, you agree with him then?”
Everett lifts my knuckles to his lips. I assume he is trying to ease the anger he must see rising through my burning cheeks. “Don’t ask me to take sides, please, darling.”
It pains me to pull my hand from this, but this isn’t fair. “I didn’t, but it’s clear whose side you have chosen.” I take my hand from Everett’s, placing it down on my lap. “Well, then I guess it’s settled.”
Everett leans forward and presses his finger below my chin. “Look at me, doll,” he says with a look full of empathy. “I will support whatever decision you make. I might worry like crazy about you, but this is your life and your right to decide. I want to know you’re safe. I wouldn’t forgive myself if I didn’t express my concerns, and something happened to you. I’m sure you must understand where I’m coming from?”
“Are you saying this because I’m a Jewish woman or because I’m a woman who wants to move across the country to fulfill a career I am passionate about?”
“I won’t lie to you, Lizzie, both reasons should be considered when you make this decision.”
I feel empty inside, like someone has flipped me upside down and is shaking me to pieces. Mom wouldn’t give in to fear. She would stand tall and ferociously show her pride to be a Jewish woman. How can I take a step back and undo what she spent her life working toward? Why does it matter who I am? “This world is despicable. No one can be who they are or want to be without criticism or law standing in the way. We are to be what the world dictates, and I’m done succumbing to conformity.”
18
