“Good,” he says. “That door better be locked the next time I try to break in.”
“Or what?” I fire back.
He turns the water off and dries his hands on the dangling dishtowel as he twists around with a smirk pinned to one side. “I’ll have to rob you, obviously.”
I shake my head at him, feeling a smile poke at the corners of my lips. I fight the urge. “Spoiler alert,” he says, pointing at the TV. “Khloe finds out Lamar cheated on her while she was in labor with their baby.”
“Lamar? Their marriage ended years ago.”
“Yeah, I don’t know.”
I open the front door of my apartment and wait for Brody to make his exit. “Thank you for going on a date with me tonight.”
“It wasn’t a date, Brody.”
He leans down and places a quick kiss on my cheek as he walks out. “I kissed you. That makes it a date.”
“Not in our thirties,” I tell him.
A look of shock passes through his eyes as he gives me one last look before I close the door. “Damn, Journey. What kind of dating are you into?”
“The kind that doesn’t exist.” I shut the door on Brody and our conversation, locking the deadbolt for good measure.
5
My head feelslike it’s spinning, but I know neither of us had enough bourbon to have that kind of effect tonight. I wasn’t expecting past demons to surface.
I’ve tried so hard to forget about the night of the accident, but it’s like my life has been woven together from the outcome of that day. I have a deep understanding of how much life can change in a split second, deeper than I prefer.
I wonder what life could have been like if I hadn’t had the New Year’s party, maybe it would’ve been worse.
The comfort of my unmade bed with an oversized heavy gray blanket is pulling me in where I will lie beneath the stars outside of my dark window.
The sky is full of glimmering sugar crystals, all awaiting wishes, but I stopped making wishes a long time ago.
My phone buzzes on the nightstand, and I stare at the device as if it will jump into my hands, but it won’t, and I’m far too comfortable to reach for a connection to the outside world.
I close my eyes, hoping for sleep to come easily, but the damn phone buzzes again, and again. It’s after ten.
I throw my blanket to the side and sit up to grab the phone, spotting the cascading messages from Brody.
He can’t be serious.
Brody:Thank you for a nice date.
Brody:That kiss was ... something else.
Brody:It was a turn-on when I heard your deadbolt slide into place after you slammed the door behind me.
I toss my head back and groan. I can’t understand what is making him so persistent. If tonight were a date, a typical guy wouldn’t text two hours later, or at least no guy I dated has done something like this. In any case, he came over uninvited.
Me:It wasn’t a date.It was something else.Maybe try watching porn.
I figure he would have a sarcastic response, but the little dots stop flickering after a long minute, so I toss the phone back to my nightstand and curl up into my nest of blankets.
Maybe my life turned this way because of Brody. If I hadn’t invited Brett to the party, Brody wouldn’t have come, and everything could be different now.
The real reason for the party was I didn’t want to be alone on New Year’s Eve of my senior year. No one wanted to be alone that night any year. Breaking up with Adam right before Christmas break wasn’t my best idea, but I had a logical reason. I would have felt worse if he had given me something special for Christmas, and I broke up with him a week later. The thought of what would happen next fall had been weighing on my mind since the beginning of the school year, and I couldn’t continue a relationship that would soon end.
