CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Amelia
May 1943 - Day 522
Iknewwe weren’t safe. I figured the worst was about to happen, and the progression of fear turning into terror consumed me as I held Lucie tightly, finally calming her into a peaceful state that quieted hercries.
However, the glow of a flashlight continued to bounce from tree to tree, hovering just a few feet above our heads. I prayed, but had little faith left after the past year. I would always look to God with questions that would go unanswered, and I often begged him for mercy, but I wasn’t sure he could hear. Though, I’m sure Mama would have rolled over in her grave if she heard mythoughts.
Charlie caressed the side of my face as he stood over us, knowing full well that if we were caught, there wasn’t anything he could do forus.
It was only minutes before the footsteps came so close, there was no way the man didn’t know precisely where we were. I figured he was taunting us, making us believe we had gotten away from him, but that was probably what his type did to people like us. Torment was a game. We could no longer move to another tree since the twigs and branches below us would crackle and crunch. As far as I was concerned, we were alreadycornered.
Just a year earlier, I would close my eyes in the face of horror, but at that moment, with Lucie in my arms, I decided to look evil in the eye with hope of intimidating the enemy. I used to react when facing danger—my heart would beat fast and hard against my sternum, pulsating in my ears. Sweat would run down the back of my neck, I’d become short of breath, and a knot would form in the pit of my stomach. However, during my time in the prison camp, fear gradually became a muted sensation as I fought against becoming a victim of the deadly solution that was quickly eradicating my race. I was convinced that I couldn’t be a victim if I fought back, and since living in fear was allowing Hitler to win, bravery was my onlydefense.
As I expected, the light found us, bearing its dreadful glow onto the tops of our heads. “What are you running from?” the manasked.
“We aren’t running,” Charlielied.
The man laughed and straightened his posture to re-light a cigar he had been smoking. “It’s obvious you’re running fromsomething.”
“No, we’re not,” Charlie said, muttering into the sleeve of hisjacket.
“Well, most people don’t dump a luxury car that looks as if it belongs to the SS, then run into the woods just two miles from the Austrianborder.”
“Who are you to care?” Charlieretorted.
“Absolutely no one, but I live about two hundred yards behind you, and I think I have a right to know who is passing through my propertytonight.”
The man waved at each of us with his flashlight, making it impossible for us to see what he looked like or what he was wearing. “We don’t mean any trouble, sir,” Isaid.
“Now, if you tell me the truth, I’ll offer you a roof to sleep under tonight. My wife and I like to keep a low profile though, so you’ll need to answer my questionsfirst.”
Charlie looked down at me and curled his arm around my shoulders. “My wife and daughter weren’t safe where we were living, and I needed to get us out of there for a while until things settledown.”
“The stolen car?” heasked.
“I had no other way to get us out ofthere.”
“There?” he continued to press thesubject.
“We were living just outside ofTerezin.”
“Just outside, huh?” the manasked.
Lucie whimpered from behind the shield I was creating, so I lifted her up and perched her on my thigh. “Shh, baby girl.” Her head fell limply against my chest, and her hands gripped the material of mydress.
“She’s quite small,” the man said. “How old is yourdaughter?”
“Just over a year,” I answered quickly, without giving Charlie the option of saying something wrong. I wouldn’t expect him to remember when she was born, considering he left just weeksafter.
“She looks much younger than that,” the man said. She had been suffering from malnutrition for a year, but if I said that, he would have known we were prisoners of acamp.
“She’s just small like her mama,” Charlie said while placing a kiss on my cheek. The lying created waves of undeserved happiness. Listening to him speak of us as a family was something I had stopped dreaming about a year earlier when he was deployed. Hearing those words come out of Charlie’s mouth at that moment, though, reignited the hope of fulfilling that dream one day—a child I could call my own, a man who loved me, a house near a field of flowers, dresses that felt like pure cotton against my skin, and delicious foods that would melt as it touched my tongue. All those thoughts had become lost within the decimation of my world, but I still held outhope.
“Come on,” he said. “That child is visibly starving.” I looked at Charlie, and he helped me up with Lucie. We didn’t know the man, but he seemed to be safe for that moment. “The house is just up ahead. I’ll meet you there if you want. My car is still on the side of theroad.”
“Sure, we’ll find our way over there,” Charlie said. Since the man left us in the woods to run if we pleased, it offered another inkling of hope that the stranger could be trusted. It was hard to tell who was on what side, who believed what, and who hated whom. Throughout the prior year, I had learned to believe that almost everyone hated me, other than Charlie. Out of desperation, the other Jews had even begun to turn on each other in the camp. It was survival of thefittest.
