“Nothing.” Her cheeks warmed at the memory. “Pastor Gray walked in, and I ran out, humiliated. With my reputation, I should have stopped it before it happened.”
Jessa shoved a palm in the air. “Stop right there. What do you mean ‘with your reputation’? You made a mistake, but you’re not that person anymore.”
“Maybe not, but it doesn’t mean people won’t judge my actions more harshly.” She laced her fingers and twiddled her thumbs. “And now Elijah’s drawn into it.”
“Did Pastor Gray say anything?” Phoebe pulled a third stool over and sat down close to her.
“Not to me. I don’t know about Elijah.”
Phoebe put a hand over hers to still them. “Pastor Gray has always been a very direct person. If there was a problem, he would have addressed it.”
“What did Elijah say?” Jessa asked.
“Nothing. We haven’t talked about it. Both of us have acted like it never happened.”
“Good grief.” Phoebe shook her head. “You know that’s not healthy. At some point you’ll have to work this out with him.”
She smirked at her sisters. “Says who?”
Phoebe laughed. “That’s the sister I’m used to.”
“In all seriousness, Phoebe is right.” Jessa’s gentle smiled offered comfort and assurance as she put her arm around Trixie’s shoulder. “The air needs to be cleared for the sake of both of you. Even if nothing comes of it, you can’t let this hang over your heads.”
“I’m not ready yet. When I do talk to him about it, I don’t want to be confused like I am now. Does that make sense?”
“It does. You know we’re here for you if you need a listening ear. Sisters stick together through thick and thin.” Jessa dropped her arm, but not before giving her shoulder a comforting squeeze.
“Thanks.” She looked at Jessa, then Phoebe. “You’re the best sisters a girl could ask for. I’d be lost without you.”
Chapter Eleven
Palm trees lined the streets. A haze lingered over the suburbs of Charleston and humidity hung heavy in the air, not a good sign of the summer to come when May had barely begun. Elijah turned the air in his truck on full blast, struck with amusement. When he’d left Jasper Lake Tuesday morning for a weeklong trip home, he’d had to turn on the heat.
The stark differences between upstate New York and coastal South Carolina stood out strong. After eight months away, he’d forgotten the beauty of his home state, but he’d also discovered the beauty of the Adirondacks. Somewhere along the way, he’d started to think of Jasper Lake as home, and that concerned him.
He only had three more months there before moving to begin seminary. At this rate, he’d leave a part of himself behind, and he didn’t like that idea. He wanted to start his new life whole without any encumbrances. But what kind of pastor would he be if he didn’t know how to care about his flock?
His thoughts drifted to Trixie. As of the time he’d left, they still hadn’t talked about what happened. He’d hoped for a chance at Easter, but she’d succeeded in avoiding any one-on-one contact with him. They didn’t have any reasons to talk at church, so she evaded him there as well.
It frustrated him to leave Jasper Lake, even for a week, without anything settled between them. He could have approached her, but she’d obviously gotten spooked. To his chagrin, he’d have to wait for her to initiate the talk. Who knew when that would be, if ever.
He sighed as he pulled into the church parking lot. If only he’d kept his lips to himself.But you don’t regret the kiss. That was true. Despite the complications it caused, he wouldn’t take it back if he could. Trixie and he shared a connection, and they owed it to themselves to explore it.
All the arguments against a possible relationship shot to the forefront of his mind. She lived in Jasper Lake, and he didn’t plan to stay there past August. She wasn’t the ideal pastor’s wife he’d always imagined marrying.
As soon as the thought entered his mind, his stomach rolled with guilt. There he went, judging her again. So what if she wasn’t a textbook life partner for a minister? She loved God and strived to live a Godly life. Demure wasn’t in her vocabulary and her spunk kept life interesting whenever he was with her. Her past helped her relate to people, and that could be an asset when he counseled his members.
You’re jumping way ahead of yourself. Any idea of marriage is a long way off.
He groaned loudly.Focus on the present and enjoy this visit with your pastor whom you haven’t seen in months.
Hopping out of his truck before his thoughts could take him captive again, he searched the parking lot and scanned the front of the property, letting the familiarity wash over him. He’d attended this church since birth and had run the halls as a kid. He and his siblings had played hide and seek while his parents attended meetings, and later on had hung out in the youth buildings many hours after services. His brother, only a year older, had showed him how to unlock the gym door so they could play basketball when they were supposed to be studying lessons. He laughed loudly, remembering how dumb they’d been. Neither had considered how loud they’d been, and ten minutes later had been marched to the pastor’s office.
Much of his life was tied to this church and held a special spot in his heart.
He opened one of the white double doors and walked inside. The familiar scent of saltwater mixed with clean linen hit his nostrils, instantly injecting him with a sense of calm. He picked up a leftover bulletin from Sunday and browsed the inside pages. Not much had changed. Same programs, same schedule. Women’s Bible study on Tuesday mornings and senior adult luncheon on Thursdays.
A small block on the upcoming events announced graduation Sunday for this coming week, the reason he’d held off on taking a vacation until now. His sister Sara would graduate high school tomorrow night and be recognized in church on Sunday for the achievement.
