He shook his head and touched a finger to her chin. “You’re beautiful.”
His eyes locked with hers, and he gulped. A definitive change blanketed them.
Wanting to kiss her, but scared to push her away, he slid his finger from her chin to cheek. When she didn’t back away, he flattened his palm and cradled her face.
His breaths came ragged, hers shallow.
Seconds passed. Afraid to break the spell, he moved only his thumb, caressed her skin.
He leaned forward, taking the risk before the moment evaporated. His lips touched hers in a kiss that knocked his world off kilter. A kiss that meant more than a meeting of mouths. It was a kiss that claimed his heart.
Sybil broke away—brushed her fingers to her lips but with alarm in her eyes. “That can’t happen again. Our lives are too complicated already.”
She ran from the room, leaving him bereft. She’d wanted the kiss—he knew that with every fiber of his being or he’d never have initiated it. But she was scared. Paralyzingly so.
And there was nothing he could do about it but pray and continue to stand by her.
Chapter Twelve
Sybil laid in bed early Sunday morning. She’d woken up at five and couldn’t fall back asleep, even though she’d stayed up late reading. Hopefully, it wouldn’t be like that all week. Her plans for her week off included lots of sleep and a small Thanksgiving dinner on Thursday at Rysa’s.
To her relief, Jared had accepted her invitation to attend with her. She’d been afraid he wouldn’t after she’d bolted from their kiss, though he’d given her no reason to think that. In the few weeks that had passed, they’d not mentioned it, and he’d not treated her any differently.
That wasn’t true. If anything, he’d been even kinder and sweeter.
Like he knew how petrified she was to attach her heart to anyone.
And that scared her more. If she couldn’t let herself fall in love with Jared, could she ever fall in love? He was everything she never knew existed in a man, and he treated her above reproach. His gentleness and patience with her exceeded all reasonable limits.
His character had convinced her there was something to this Christianity thing. She’d read through the Bible he’d lent her, and returned it last week after stopping at the bookstore and buying one of her own.
In the wee hours of the night, she’d replayed everything she’d read and all that Jared had told her. She couldn’t understand everything, but she knew. The stories and words within those pages were real.
It was those thoughts that had awakened her. She sat up in bed and propped her pillows behind her. For the fifth time, she read through the book of John. The words came alive, and she not only believed their truth, but she also wanted what they offered.
Jared had said something about a prayer, but she didn’t know what to say. She flipped to the back of her Bible, to the pages of reference material, and found a suggested prayer. Reciting the words out loud, tranquility showered her.
The pain of never knowing a father lifted. The burden of her upbringing eased. The shame of being an unwed mother melted away.
She didn’t even try to stop the tears as she breathed in the new truths. No longer was she Sybil Hollis—hot mess extraordinaire—but Sybil Hollis, a daughter of the King.
Where did she go from here?
Church.
She should go today.
Knots twisted in her stomach. Believing in God was one thing, but believing in the church she’d heard so many horror stories about?
Could her infant faith sustain a rejection so soon?
Perhaps if she went with a friend, but the only two she had now were Rysa and Jared. Could she badger Rysa into attending with her? No, that wouldn’t be fair to Rysa to put her on the spot after what she’d been through. Sybil would soon tell her about her decision and ask Rysa to consider going with her in the future.
That left Jared. She couldn’t explain her reluctance to tell him—yes, she could. Her decision to follow Christ would bring them closer, and that frightened her.
Yet, she couldn’t keep it from him.
She unplugged her phone from the charger and called him.
