Jared played along. “Been a while since I’ve been on a horse. Helicopters are my ride of choice lately.”
Crooking a finger to her chin, Dottie eyed them. “Marine Corps, right?”
Evan nodded. “Yes, ma’am, and South Louisiana for me. Cajun country, born and bred.”
“That was my guess with that accent and those dark features. A cowboy and a bayou boy. What a pair.” Dottie turned her attention to Janie. “What about you sweetheart? My guess is Midwest, but I can’t decide which state.”
“Iowa.” Janie smiled, enjoying the friendly conversation with a stranger.
“What brings you up this way? Vacation?”
“A friend’s wedding in Lilston.” Evan unwrapped his silverware and placed the napkin on his lap.
“Nice area. I’ve passed through several times on my way to Erie.” She laid a stack of extra napkins on the table. “Enjoy your meal. Just holler if you need anything else.”
Janie picked at her food—a hard action to hide when she had a humongous grilled chicken sandwich in front of her with barbecue sauce overflowing onto the fries. She squirted a stream of ketchup onto her plate and dipped a fry. Nibbled at a few before cutting her sandwich in half.
The sauce trickled onto her hand when she picked up the bun. A single bite convinced her to eat the entire sandwich. It would be a shame to waste food that good. Before she realized it, she’d eaten her whole meal, the most she’d eaten at one sitting since Mike died.
Belly full, she relaxed in her chair, waiting for Evan to finish his ribs and Jared to eat the last bites of his bacon cheeseburger. Perhaps the change of scenery was helping her after all—but it had been a process. Or maybe she’d just been hungry for too long. Either way, peace she hadn’t experienced in months cascaded over her. She’d take it for the moment.
Dottie stopped by the table, and Jared asked for the check.
“It’s already taken care of.” Dottie tipped her head to an older couple walking out the door. “They overhead you’re military and wanted to pay your tab. Said it’s the least they could do for those who’ve risked their lives for our country.”
The innocent, gracious, sentiment shattered the fragile peace Janie had found. She pushed away from the table. “Excuse me.”
Evan and Jared cast her a sympathetic gaze, and she figured they understood. No one in the restaurant except them could possibly know that her husband had paid the ultimate price. She ran to the restroom before anyone could see her tears. Just because she couldn’t get her emotions under control didn’t mean she had to bring everyone else down, especially after the act of kindness shown toward her and her friends.
She leaned against the cold tile wall in the bathroom, blotting her eyes with a rough paper towel. Would the nightmare ever end? Would she ever be able to hear a simple statement without melting down?
Her reflection in the mirror caught her attention. The twenty pounds she’d lost since December made her face gaunt and pale. Her cheekbones protruded more than they should, and dark circles rested under her sad eyes. Even looking into her own eyes reminded her of Mike—he always said the shade of brown and green reminded him of dried moss.
The bathroom door creaked opened, and Janie ducked her head until she saw Dottie.
“The boys told me your situation. I’m really sorry.” Dottie pressed a tentative hand to Janie’s arm. “My first husband died in a boating accident twenty-five years ago. Being a young widow’s not easy.”
“I’m sorry.” Overcome by embarrassment at her rapid escape to the restroom, Janie tucked a hair behind her ear.
“People will give you all sort of advice about moving on, but most of them have never walked in your shoes.”
“Don’t I know that already.” If another person told her how time healed all wounds, or that she’d find love again, she couldn’t be held responsible for her reaction.
“Would you be willing to hear advice from a woman who’s been there?” Dottie lowered her hand and didn’t speak again until Janie nodded. “There’s no way to sugarcoat it and tell you time will magically heal your pain. Truth be told, you’ll never forget your first husband. Take all the time you need to grieve. Rushing the process will only prolong it.”
“Will it get easier?” Tears threatened to form, but her eyes remained dry for now.
“In time. The pain dulls, and you’ll find ways to remember the good. You might even fall in love again, but make sure it’s for the right reasons.”
She shook her head. “Love’s not on my radar.”
An adoring expression settled on Dottie’s face. “It wasn’t on mine either, and I almost missed out on a great twenty years because I was afraid. That said—follow your heart. When you’re ready, you will know, but don’t settle for less than love for the sake of not being alone.”
“I’m not sure I’ll ever be ready.”
“Only God knows.” Dottie gifted her an empathetic grin. “I won’t keep you, but when your friends told me your story, God nudged my heart to follow you in here.”
“Thank you.”To you and God for sending you here. She worked up to a smile. “I was having a pity party for myself, and I needed the reminder I’m not the only person who’s suffered a loss.”
