ONE
ATLEE
I don’t recognizethe face staring back at me. There’s no way it can be mine. A purple bruise covers a good portion of the right side, and my lip is split. My hair hurts where the robber must have grabbed himself a handful. I don’t remember it, but that’s the only thing I can think of.
Shame flutters in my stomach. This isn’t my fault, and it’s not as if I asked to be hit, but the shame is still there.
“Are you going to work today?” The deep voice belongs to Devlin Nelson. It sends goose bumps along my arms and up my neck. It isn’t like it’s the first time I’ve heard him speak, or even the first time he’s spoken close to my ear. It is, however, the first time he’s sounded irritated and angry on my behalf.
“No,” I whisper, shaking my head. “I don’t want anyone to see me like this.”
He grunts as his gaze travels my face. “People should see you, see what that motherfucker did to you, but that’s your decision.”
I swallow roughly. “I especially don’t want my sister to see me. Thank you for bringing me here.”
“Wasn’t like I was about to let you go anywhere else last night.”
Glancing around, I realize we’re in a small house. I always assumed Devlin lived with the rest of his brothers in the big house on the property. It’s at the forefront of my mind, and I have to ask the question. “Do you live by yourself?”
He was speaking, and I interrupted him. With a shake of his head and a grin, he inhales deeply. “Yeah. I’m the oldest, and there’s no way I’m living with my little brothers as an adult. Already did that. Built this place on my own. It’s not much, but it’s mine.”
“Is it still on the Nelson land?”
“Yeah, we’re about half a mile from the main house. Not too far, but far enough that we aren’t up each other’s asses.”
He’s never spoken to me at length like this, and I’m learning more about him in this conversation than I’ve ever known. “Is that important to you? To have privacy?” I raise my eyebrows at him. “For all your women?” My heart pounds against my ribs as I wait for him to answer.
“All my women?” He runs a hand through his hair. “You think I’m bringing a bunch of women out here?”
I shrug, pulling my zip-up jacket tighter around me. “I don’t know. There isn’t a lot I know about you, but I do wonder if I’m fucking up whatever it might be that you have going.”
“If there was a chance of you fucking something up, do you think I would’ve brought you out here?”
I don’t know. “Maybe you feel sorry for me?”
Reaching forward, his thumb and forefinger grip my chin lightly. He pulls it down so that our eyes meet one another. He licks his lips and clicks his tongue. “There are a lot of things I feel for you, Atlee. Sorry isn’t one of ’em.”
I fucking melt into the floor. No man my age is out here saying these things to me. I’m lucky if they even remember my name after the first swipe and text message. I never thought I’d have a crush on an older man, but here we are. “Oh, yeah?” Itilt my head to the side. “What’s one of those things you feel for me?” Call me a glutton for punishment, but my body hurts, and my face is bruised. I need a win, and if I’ve gotta ask for it, then I will.
He clears his throat, grunting a little. Pulling his bottom lip between his teeth, his white teeth chomp down, and he groans. “Fuck, Atlee. You don’t wanna know.”
“I do,” I plead. “Look, what happened last night really shook me. I need a win. I need to know that I’m gonna come out on the other side of this, because right now? I’m not sure I’m going to.”
“You are.” He moves his hand from my chin, cupping my cheek with his palm. “I’m going to make sure you do.” He swallows hard, his Adam’s apple moving up and down with it. “And if I have to tell you the shit I’ve been thinkin’ about you in order to make sure you know, then that’s what I’ll do.”
My cheeks heat as I realize what he’s saying. He has been thinking about me, and he’s about to give me the win I’ve asked for. “Don’t lay it on too thick, Devlin. Then I won’t believe you.”
He grins, the sides of his lips curving up. “Since the night you and I rode together when Truett was injured, I’ve done nothing but think about you. In a friendly way, in a not-so-friendly way. In any of the ways I can think about you, I’ve thought about you. Whether I should or not, whether it keeps me up at night or not.” He shoves his free hand through his hair. “More nights than I care to admit, I’m lying in there.” He tilts his head toward what I’ve learned is his bedroom. “Thinking about you.”
My heart is thudding, and I’m breathless as I lean in closer, wanting to know what else he’s going to say. “What are you thinking?” I whisper, hanging on to his every word.
“Shit…” He reaches forward with his free hand and tugs me to him, holding me close. “Every single thing I shouldn’t be thinking about you. You’re too young, but it doesn’t stop me from wondering what you look like without your clothes on.What you would sound like if my lips tugged on what I imagine are cherry red nipples. If you get a hitch in your breath when you come.”
I close my eyes and inhale sharply. Men—boys, really—my age don’t talk like this. At least not to me. I’ve wanted them to, but never knew how to ask for it, and hoped I wouldn’t have to. If anyone were to ever talk about me, they wouldn’t say that I’m confident.
I’m not.
But I do know what I want, and Devlin Nelson ticks every single one of my boxes. Before last night, I would never have done what I’m about to do. Now though? Now I know what it’s like to worry that you won’t make it through a shift, what it’s like to wonder if someone will come find you in time. So I’m not willing to push my luck anymore. I’m not willing to settle back and wait for the person who’s supposed to make my blood rush through my veins.
