I laugh, feeling some of the heavy weight lift from my chest. “She’s too good for me.”
“She is,” he nods firmly. “And if you wait too long, you’re going to regret it forever when she decides to move on.” That thought alone brings on a new wave of panic. “We cannot control the future, son, and we can’t live every day in fear of it either. It shouldn’t stop you from enjoying the moments we have.”
“I’m running out of time, aren’t I? With Emilia.”
“You are, and soon, she’ll stop waiting for you,” he says, those cold eyes I inherited from him finding mine. “It’s your choice to pick whether to make her yours or let her move on with her life. But make the choice fast. Best believe I will break you into pieces if you hurt her. She may not be my daughter by blood, but I helped raise that girl. Son or not, you’ll not like what I do if you break her heart again. Your brothers will be only too happy to help.”
Fuck, he doesn’t need to tell me that. It chips into me every time I do something to hurt her, and it’s time I made up for that. Time I accepted that she’s it for me and stopped fighting it.
“You don’t have to worry,” I assure my father. “I won’t repeat that mistake.”
“Good.”
I could lose her tomorrow, or hell, I could be the one to die. I am, after all, the one who has people chasing after him with guns. It all could happen tomorrow, and I would die never knowing what it's like to be loved by a woman as beautiful and smart as Emilia. As perfect, inside and out, as the woman whose heart I keep breaking.
Fuck, I’m going to do some serious groveling this time before I get back in her good graces.
But first, I need to talk to Silvia and Luca…
Chapter Five
Emilia
I hate him!
I slam the door shut and don’t bother kicking off my house slippers as I stumble forward and collapse on the bed. Face first. The pillow is soft, but it doesn’t do anything to cushion my broken heart.
They say there is a thin line between love and hate, and I might’ve found that line. I’m teetering so hard on that line that I can't even tell which side I'll fall. Antonio keeps pushing me back and forth.
I love him.
How could a man make me feel so good and build me up to be tall only for him to knock down my foundation? The way he jumped away from me earlier, like he was afraid of being seen with me—of anyone knowing that Antonio Rossi might actually have feelings. That this might be something real.
I hate him. I hate him. I hate him.
My hands ball into fists, knuckles turning white as I dig them into the mattress. Tears come, hot and fast, quickly soaking the pillow. I try to hold them back, to not be affected by Antonio, but the dam breaks and a sobs rips through me. It's a raw, ugly sound that makes me want to seek out the man and tear him to shreds like he has my heart.
I hate that I love him.
Why him? Anger flares, burning through my chest as I question why the heck it has to be Antonio Rossi and no one else. Why is he the only man who can leave my body burning, and heaven knows I’ve tried. Back in California, I tried seeing a guy who looked a little like Antonio, but the moment he touched my hand, it felt…wrong. It was almost like I was cheating on Antonio by being with him.
How is it that I can’t move on from this man!
I love him so much, I wish I could hate him.
I don't know how long I lay there. Long enough for the tears to dry and the sadness to harden into something sharper. The pillow is damp beneath my cheek, but I'm done crying. Now I'm just angry.
Angry at him for making me feel this way. Angry at myself for letting him.
The door creaks open but I barely register the sound. The bed dips beside me, a subtle shift in the mattress before a small hand touches my back.
“Emilia?” Gabriella’s soft voice breaks through the thoughts echoing in my head, so I lift my head from the pillow and realize she's not alone when I spot my mother standing by the door, concern written in her eyes.
“Cara,” she says but doesn’t move from the door. “I would kick him for you, but he’s already injured.”
I crack a smile at that.
“I’ll trip him the next time I see him,” Gabriella promises, grabbing my arm and pulling me to sit up. “Antonio is dumb as a rock.”
