I should sit down. My legs are trembling, and the ache in my thighs has spread up into my hips. But I keep standing at the window, watching the gardeners tend the rose bushes. I can’t make myself move.
Somewhere below me, Brennan will be telling my father what he found. He’ll explain how Nella saw him in the common room of the inn. Then they’ll question Nella too. She was with me. She saw everything. Me training with fae, eating with them, living among them willingly.
What will my father think?
My hand drifts up to my throat and the marks Cairn left there. Brennan didn’t mention them on the ride here, but hemusthave seen them. Does he think they’re marks of violence or can he tell they’re bites of passion?
My fingers drift down, seeking out the chain around my neck. My heart stops. My breathing stills.
It’s gone.
Spinning, I hurry across to the mirror and stare at my reflection. The collar … the chain Cairn turned it into … it’sgone. Is that why I couldn’t reach him? Does the collar have something to do with the connection?
No. No, he said it was the blood bond … and the Nightwild magic. It has nothing to do with the collar.
A knock at the door snaps me out of the thoughts spiraling in my head, and I turn as servants file in with buckets of steaming water, filling the tub in the corner. Another brings a tray of food—roasted chicken, honeyed parsnips, fresh bread, and a slice of spiced apple cake. She sets it on the table by the window.
“Cook wanted you to have your favorites, Highness.”
“Thank her for me.”
They leave as quietly as they arrived. I stay where I am, thinking about Cairn.
Is he looking for me? Or has he decided I’m not worth the trouble?
If it’s not because of the collar that I can’t reach him, is it because he’s given up on me? Maybe I would deserve it if he had. Vel was shot because of me.
I force myself to move to the tub, unlacing my clothes as I walk, letting them fall to the floor, and climb into the water. The heat stings my skin, and I sink lower, rest my head back against the rim and close my eyes.
The water is cooling before I move to wash, scrubbing my skin until it turns pink. My hair is tangled, and I don’t have the patience to work through them, so I yank the comb through, ripping out knots, not caring when it hurts.
Once I’m done, I climb out and dress. The silken material feels strange against my skin, the skirts swirling around my legs making me feel oddly undressed after wearing tunic and pants for so long.
My eyes move to the untouched food, the chicken congealing in its glaze, and my stomach turns. I can’t face food right now. Not when I need to know what they’re telling my father about me.
I’m sitting in front of the mirror when the knock comes.
“Your Highness. The king requests your presence.”
My stomach drops.
“Give me a second.”
I look in the mirror. My hair is damp, hanging loose around my face. The neckline of my dress sits low enough that the faded marks on my throat are visible, even with my hair down. There’s nothing I can do about it. I will just have to face whatever is coming with my head held high.
I stand and open the door. The guard straightens. “Highness.”
The walk to my father’s study has never felt so long, and when we reach it the stony-faced guards open the door without a word. I step inside.
My father is behind his desk. Brennan stands to his right, arms folded across his chest. Beside the window, there’s a man I don’t recognize, clad in gray robes, with his hands clasped in front of him.
My heart leaps into my throat.
A mage.
“Please, sit down, my daughter.” My father’s voice is gentle. “We need to talk about what’s been done to you.”
“Done to me?” I stay standing, my hand on the back of the chair. “The only thing that’s been done to me is Brennan tying me up like a common criminal!”
