‘Right, right. Well, let me think about it.’
‘She doesn’t believe us.’ Lucy sniffs. ‘This is ageism at its finest!’
‘No, no,’ I hurry to reassure them.
‘It bloody well is.’ Lucia shakes her head. ‘Once a woman summits the hill towards eighty everyone automatically thinks she’s past her best-by date. It’s downright offensive. According to society a man ages like fine wine, when women are seen as less. It’s criminal.’
‘I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that. I’m well aware how clever you three are. I bet you had interesting careers before you retired.’ And I’d like to know because I’m not sure if they’re pulling my leg or if this kookiness is real. You just never know on this island.
‘Wouldn’t you like know?’ Lucy smirks.
‘Yes.’
‘It’s classified,’ Lucia says in a huff.
‘You worked for MI5?’
Lucy tuts. ‘What a cliché, no we did not. This is not a Hollywood movie, Harper, this is real life. MI5. Honestly.’
‘OK, I’m just so confused.’
‘If you must know, detail-driven person like you are, a few months ago we had a man come to the resort to offer ancestry classes to build our family trees – you know, before we kick the bucket and the information is lost?—’
‘Like all we do is think about our impending deaths or something.’
‘Anyway, it was as tedious as you can imagine, hunting out my great-great-grandmother Gertrude whose greatest claim to fame was having eleven children with her husband Alfred, an alcoholic farmer from Somerset.’
‘Terrible stuff. She should have been the one drinking herself into an early grave with all those children attached to her hip.’
‘The responsibility always lies with the woman, doesn’t it?’
‘I’m not following?’ I gently direct them back to the matter at hand.
‘Well, the ancestry class was dead boring. Even the facilitator Matteo’s good looks couldn’t ease the ennui.’
‘Handsome, he was.’ Lucia grins.
‘Wasn’t he?’
‘Handsome, sure. But he gave me the ick,’ Lucy says.
‘The ick?’
‘You know, made my skin crawl.’
‘Why didn’t you just say that then?’
‘Why should I not express myself the way it comes naturally?’
‘Ladies.’
‘Sorry, Harper. Lucia does go off on these tangents when men are involved.’
‘Me? It’s because Lucy insists on using Gen Z speak.’
‘I’m only keeping my finger on the pulse.’
‘So you did the family tree ancestry class and…?’ It’s impossible to keep them on track.
