“I want to believe that this is a safe place with safe people. That Malachi is a safe wolf, whether or not he’s my mate. But Drew—the alpha who took me—I didn’t know what he was. I didn’t see it soon enough. And on top of that, Drew was supposed to be my new start after the total mess of codependency that was my boyfriend before him. At this point, how do I trust myself to see Malachi clearly? Or any of you?”
“You’re saying youshouldhave seen what Drew was. Implying youcouldhave.”
“Well, yeah, of course.”
“So, what, he was wearing a sandwich board that said ‘controlling violent psycho’ and you failed to read it?”
April stared at her. The question was too stupid to be in earnest, yet Ember looked serious. “Um, no?”
“Okay, then I’m missing something.”
“There are signs. You know. Red flags. Which idiots like me don’t recognize.”
“Such as?” Ember said.
Okay, clearly the woman was headed somewhere. And, at least for the moment, April’s curiosity was stronger than her shame at discussing this. “He wanted to know everything about me on the first date—including things youdon’ttell on the first date. He wanted every minute of my time. He said it was all because I was so important to him, but…but it wasn’t that at all. It was about charming me and isolating me.”
“So he was a smooth-talking liar before he was a violent psycho. I still don’t see how that makes you an idiot, April.”
April’s hand lowered her latte to her knee so as not to drop it. “Um…but…I…”
“When a violent person does something violent, people really ought to blamethatperson, you know. Not the one he did it to.”
“Oh,” April whispered. “That…that feels true.”
Ember nodded as though she’d stated the grass was green rather than shone a light into April’s murky self-doubt. “It’s okay to need time, though. Trust is scary as Hades on a good day.”
April laughed and nearly spilled her latte, and Ember laughed too.
“Sorry, it’s turning into a habit. See, my best friend Claire is all about Greek gods when she wants to swear. She started doing it when we were in grade school because the actual swears would get her in trouble, and now she’s twenty-eight years old and still doesn’t use them. I tried her method to keep from swearing around Quinn. Now that I’m his guardian, I want to be extra aware.” She rolled her eyes. “Pregnancy has turned me into a chatterbox. To sum up, don’t be surprised if you hear my nephew thank Olympus.”
April laughed until her stomach hurt. She felt her body truly, fully relax for the first time since… She didn’t know when. Tears streamed down her face, and she lost track of the moment they ceased to be tears of laughter. She huddled in the chair and let herself cry.
When the tears ran out, she said, “Thanks, Ember.”
“Sure.”
“I didn’t know I needed that.”
“Need to change the subject?”
“No, I…I’d rather tell you the rest. Drew targeted me because I was already a mess, thanks to the relationship I’d just left. Nik wasn’t violent, but codependency was an ongoing problem, and I finally had to end things.” She explained it all to Ember as she had to Malachi, even her lost dream job.
“Oh, April,” Ember said when she finished. “That’s so much.”
She hadn’t run out of tears after all. She swiped at her cheeks with one hand, the remaining half of her latte cooling in the other. “The—the assault was—I can’t talk about it yet. But I can say my heart broke when I realized I wouldn’t get to start the school year with my very own classroom full of kids.”
“What a piece of crap that wolf is.”
“Yeah. He really is.” April drew a long breath. “Thanks for listening to all this. I hope I wasn’t too much.”
Ember waved a dismissal. “Not possible.”
“Well, don’t sell your patience short. It’s going to benefit your child so much.”
Ember pressed her lips together, then blinked a few times. “So…um…not to be too much myself, but I think I needed to hear that. I can’t wait to meet this pup.” The hand resting on her belly gave a little pat. “But I aged out of the foster system, and sometimes I worry I missed out on mothering instincts.”
“You seem to do great with Quinn.” So much so that April would never have guessed this to be an insecurity in Ember.
