"Yeah."
"Then stop fighting this." My hand slides to the back of his neck. "Stop making it complicated."
"It is complicated."
"Everything's complicated. We can handle complicated." I pull him down slightly. "Kiss me."
For a moment he resists. I can feel the war in him—duty versus want, control versus surrender. Then something breaks.
His mouth finds mine and it's everything I expected. Focused, intense, no hesitation once he commits. His hands frame my face, gentle despite the heat between us. I rise on my toes, press closer, and he makes a sound low in his throat that sends heat through my entire body.
The kiss deepens. His hands slide to my waist, pull me flush against him. I thread my fingers through his hair and hold on. This is what I wanted—all that controlled intensity focused on me, no more pulling away, no more careful distance.
When we finally break apart, both breathing hard, he rests his forehead against mine.
"This is still a terrible idea," he says.
"Probably." I'm trying to catch my breath. "But we're doing it anyway."
"Yeah." His thumb traces my jaw. "We are."
He kisses me again. Slower this time, thorough, taking his time to explore. My back hits the counter and I don't care. His hands are careful, respectful even now, but there's heat underneath the control.
When we break apart again, I'm shaking slightly.
"We should—" He stops. Starts again. "We should probably go to bed."
"Probably."
Neither of us moves.
"To sleep," he clarifies.
"Right. Sleep." I'm still holding onto his shoulders. "That's definitely what we should do."
His smile is slow, devastating. "Come on."
He takes my hand, leads me back to the bedroom. We slide under covers, but this time there's no careful distance. I curl into his side, his arm around me, his warmth seeping into places that have been cold for too long.
"This okay?" he asks quietly.
"Yeah. This is good."
His hand traces patterns on my shoulder. Gentle, absent-minded. Soothing.
"For the record," he says, "you were right earlier."
"About what?"
"About me living like I'm still deployed. Like I don't want attachments." His voice is quiet in the dark. "Easier to keep distance than risk losing someone again."
I shift to look at him. "And now?"
"Now I'm figuring out that some risks are worth taking." His fingers brush my cheek. "Even when they scare the hell out of me."
I kiss him softly. "We'll figure it out."
"Yeah. We will."
