“Emotional devastation,” from Sammie.
“The black hole where happiness goes to die,” from Atticus.
Ivy blinked at the three of them.
“You should check it out,” Kai said, popping a straw into his soft drink.
Ivy chuckled. “Yeah, I’ll get right on that.”
Sammie shoved her brother out of the way to go grab another beer for herself. When she got back, Atticus was glaring at his glass of water, sipping it begrudgingly.
“Just one beer,” he said.
Ivy shook her head. “No.”
“You are my trainer, not my dietician.”
“And both your coach and your captain would be on my side.”
“Can wenotsit here and talk shop all evening?” Kai asked, a bored stare on his face as he pulled his pink-tipped hair back into a low bun. “I quit volleyball in college, didn’t realize I was still going to have to hear about it for the rest of my life.”
The words only made Atticus grin, and something in Sammie’s chest squeezed tight. Not a bad tightness, but a tightness that made her feel safe. It was the part of her that was tied intrinsically to her twin, and knowing that he’d found his happiness in Kai, knowing that what they had was so much more than the flings of Atticus’ past, it settled something inside of Sammie.
Atticus was happy, so unbelievably happy.
A different feeling, one that she refused to acknowledge, a stone settling deep in her gut, was there as well. A stone that grew, that pulsed and threatened to take over every part of her. A pervasive wondering, echoing a question over and over in the cavern of her mind.
Would she find that same sort of happiness? The kind that made her brother forget he was mad at his boyfriend over an anime the moment Kai alluded to their future together. Could Sammie have that someday, too?
It didn’t feel possible. She hadn’t had time to see her only remaining family member for two weeks. They’d hardly even talked, between work and the inevitable exhaustion brought on by said work. Life was so much already, how could she ever find time for anything more?
“I’m with Kai, actually,” Ivy said. “I’m pretty sick of all things volleyball at the moment. Been pulling extra hours prepping for the tournament.”
“You’re as bad as me.” Sammie braced her arms on the table, resting her cheek on a fist. “We really need to get a life.”
“I say start by quitting your job,” Atticus chimed in. Both women turned toward him, and he pointed at Ivy. “Not you. We need you.” His attention turned to Sammie, and even though she knew he was half-teasing, it still made something warm run through her veins, knowing that he could see how much her job was affecting her.
“Leave that place,” he continued. “Tell off that asshole of a boss you’ve got. Find something you like better that doesn’t run you ragged like this.”
Kai was nodding along. “Youdohave bags under your eyes right now.”
Ivy reached up and poked under Sammie’s left eye. “He’s right.”
“Fuck you both,” Sammie growled, glowering at her beer. “I can’t just quit.”
She could feel Atticus vibrating next to her and knew he was holding back something she wouldn’t want to hear.
Sammie sighed. “Just say it.”
“You could get a different job if you sold the house.”
The rock swelling in her stomach grew tenfold, transforming into something that threatened to spill out of her.
“I’m not selling the house.”
This wasn’t the first time they’d had this conversation. It had come up several times over the last year or so. Sure, in an ideal world Sammie would quit her job, tell Robert Everly to get sincerely fucked, and go find some place where everything she’d learned about brewing could be put to better use. Somewhere that valued her and all her craft knowledge.
But Everly paid well. It wasn’t the gold standard pay rate for the industry by any means, but it was enough. Enough for Sammie to have her small apartment, her Jeep. Her grandmother’s house. Sure, she hadn’t been left with a mortgage, but her childhood home always,alwaysneeded something else repaired, and Sammie wasn’t about to let it fall into ruin.
