I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop, and the anxiety is fucking killing me. Questions I can’t answer keep playing on repeat like a song I can’t get out of my head.
Why has no one done anything? How can I go around drinking and partying when I should be suspended, or doing community service? I should bepunishedfor the shit I’ve done, but it’s like no one cares.
That dread expectation feels like a grenade with the pin pulled out sitting in my pocket, waiting to blast a hole in my gut.
Someone grabs my shoulder and gives me a hard shake.
“Kai!”
“Fuck,what?” I mutter, squinting up at Blake through burning eyes.
“Come on, dude, wake up. Nolan got some premium shit from his cousin’s roommate.”
I give him the finger and roll over, pulling a pillow over my head. Then the smell of weed hits my nose through the fucking pillow. I roll onto my back again, staring blearily at the bong hovering above my head as Blake starts to tip it over.
“Rip it, or drink it.”
I should be threatened with bong water more often because, fuck, that’s the fastest I’ve ever gotten out of bed. The fact that the water in that bong hasn’t been changed since rush sure helps.
That shitstinks.
Plus, bong rips help with the memories.
As should the line of coke I’m about to snort off one of Blake’s phone screens. Turns out Nolan’s ‘premium shit’ came in a tiny baggie all the way from Miami.
Weird how I’ve never done coke before, but ever since I snorted those lines off Haven’s ass, I’ve been accepted into some elite coke-head gang. People justknow.And now it’s my turn to corrupt innocents to the dark side.
“Looks like baby powder.” Kruger squints at the fat line from less than an inch away, prompting Nolan to yank him away by the shoulder.
“It’s premium!” Nolan snaps, looking ready to punch anyone who argues.
“That’s what you said last time, and I couldn’t feel my face for two days,” Blake says as I take the rolled-up twenty he hands me.
“Poor baby.” Nolan stands, bouncing on his heels. “Want me to call your mama?”
Blake gives him the finger without looking. “Want me to call yours? She left her number last time.”
I snort the line, and immediately regret it as the coke stings its way up my nose and down the back of my throat. I sniff hard, eyes watering as numbness spreads over my face.
“Fuck you,” Nolan says.
“Kruger, you’re up,” I manage in a thick voice.
“Dude…I dunno…”
“You wanna play or not?” Blake says, already chopping up a new line on his phone. “No one works my kitchen sober. Especially you. Your reaction times are way too slow.”
I listen to them bicker as I sink back into the couch, blinking hard as I run my hands down my numb face. I don’t feel like I did at Rooke’s house. This shit is fierce, and raw, and makes me want to go cannonball the pool.
Then again, I had mollyanda shit ton more weed and booze in my system that night.
“Fucking peer pressure,” Kruger mumbles as takes the twenty from Blake and sits forward to snort his line.
“Anyone got gum?” I ask, realizing I’m clenching my teeth almostexactlylike the molly I didn’t have is kicking in.
Austin tosses me a pack. “Grinding already? Fucking lightweight.”
“I’d like to keep my enamel,” I say, popping two pieces in my mouth.
