“Maybe the third Vow counteracts that part of the effect. If you’re not feeling it yet—I mean, you’re desperately in love with your Miss Harper, that’s a good …” Martinelli trailed off.
Peter opened his eyes just in time to see the dawning look of shock on Martinelli’s face. He thought of the terms of the Vow Martinelli had taken—to keep secret what he, Peter, told him tonight—and rushed to get it on the record first: “It’s Miss Harper I exchanged Vows with.”
“You Vowed to herandshe Vowed to you?”
“Yes.”
“Just to be, you know, absolutely clear: You taught her how to cast a spell?”
“Yes.”
“And itworked?”
“Eventually,” Peter said, truthfully enough. It had taken Beatrix several tries the first time.
He’d just admitted to felonies. He braced himself for the blowback.
Martinelli gave a low whistle. “That’s fascinating. Shouldn’t be possible, of course, and I’d really like to know how you did it, but—more to the point—why did you?”
Yes.Why. “She took a Vow to do me no harm because I’m paranoid. I took a Vow to do her sister no harm because Beatrix Harper has a perfectly justified distrust of wizards.”
“And she’s fighting the effects—that was what you meant, wasn’t it, when you said she would never love you,” Martinelli said.
Peter nodded.
Martinelli tapped the arm of his chair. “You know what happens to men who fall in love with men, the ruin they face. Don’t you think the two pairs I told you about fought against it? But the Vows win all fights. They’ll win this one, too.”
“God, no,” Peter said, the words bursting out. “I’ll have to leave—I’ll just have to leave and pray that some distance will help.”
Martinelli sat up. He looked alarmed. “Don’t do that. No, I mean it! You bound yourselves together with a Vow—lotsof Vows—and every fiber of your being and hers is intent on seeing this through. If simply revowing can drive a wizard insane, what do you think will happen to you andherif you’re halfway across the country?”
Peter slid further into his chair. If he ran, they were doomed. If he stayed and was arrested, doomed.
“Drink,” Martinelli advised, so he did. He drained his glass and poured them both another.
“Feel free to tell me to go to hell,” Martinelli said after a while, “but … what is it like?”
“Like … the most powerful, unsettling feeling you can imagine. It’s hard to be in the same room because the urge to touch her is so strong.” He shook his head. “I should have realized she wasn’t the only one under a compulsion.”
How would he feel about her if not for the Vows? Would he even like her at this point? He thought of Plan B and his anger about it flared back to life like a poorly smothered fire. But it sputtered as he remembered her anguished face and what she’d said.I didn’t want to keep this from you. I just didn’t know what to do.
It was hardly the day to be upset at her for Plan B, in any case, when the job he’d made her take had nearly gotten her arrested.
He swallowed, throat raw. No mystery about how, if not for the Vows, she would feel abouthim.
Martinelli swirled the bit of wine left in his glass. “The other wizards hardly wanted to talk about it, so here’s what I’ve been wondering: Is it just physical desire, this feeling for each other?”
“No,” he said. “No, it goes far beyond that. There’s a connection—I feel what she feels and vice versa. And the dream state … it cuts through the usual ways you separate yourself from other people. You say what you think. It’s hard to hold back.” He paused. “Sheknowsme. She knows me in a way that no one else ever has or could, and I know her in the same way.”
Martinelli cocked his head. “Isn’t that the very definition of love?”
Peter gave a wan smile. “Well, that’s why I never questioned that Ididlove her. But it’s a fabrication. You must see that makes all the difference.”
They drank some more. Then they walked unsteadily into the kitchen to get a late dinner—should have eaten first, definitely should have eaten first—and this time Martinelli accepted when offered a bed.
“Lemme borrow your phone first,” he said. “Need to call in sick. Sick of the whole operation.”
Peter snorted. “Here’s a tip: Don’t say that.”
