Just then, my phone rang again. It was Coach Slanch. I picked it up and put it on speaker phone.
“Just what in the hell did you get yourself into now? I specifically told youno Vegas weddings.”
“Sorry Coach,” I winked at Cat. “There’s this thing called true love.”
“True love?” Slanch barked. “Jesus Christ LeBlanc, you must think I was born yesterday. I’ve seen the wedding video.”
“You have?”
“Christ, the entire country has seen it. You know what junkies people are for a sensational news story these days. And this has all the elements. Celebrity, drinking. I told you not to snapchat!”
“I deleted my snapchat, though,” I pointed out. “They leaked the video.”
“I need you to be real with me. Did you marry a one-night stand?”
“No, Coach.”
“Thank God. So it’s a hoax?”
“I’ve known her fortwonights. Not one.”
Coach Slanch must have been holding his hand over the receiver, because all I could make out were unintelligible swears until he came back to the phone and said, “That’s not fucking funny, LeBlanc.”
I looked over at Cat, and I decided in that very moment, I needed to believe everything I said about us from now on. “Look, Coach. Cat’s the one. If you have a problem with that?—”
“I don’t have a problem with it. But I just hope to God you know what you’re doing.”
“So is that why you called me? To give me marital advice?”
“No. I called you to tell you that you were being traded, but the deal is now on hold.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Old Man Bells pulled the trigger on a trade to send you to Los Angeles late last night. But Los Angeles is refusing it because they think you’re a total headcase, and not worth the trouble of a trade after that video from last night circulated. They don’t want a character issue.”
I breathed a sigh of relief. “So you’re saying my Vegas wedding saved me from being traded?” It wasn’t exactly the reasoning I was looking for, but if it kept me on the team, it worked. I was ecstatic.
“Yes,” Coach Slanch said. “But that’s not all.”
“No?”
“Old Man Bells is starting up another trade, to Florida.”
“Florida? Gross. He knows I can’t stand hot weather hockey.”
“You’ve really gone and done it now,” he added. “He’s pissed. I’ve never seen him like this. I don’t know if someone put a bug in his ear or what, but he wants you gone.”
I felt the bottom drop out of my stomach. I was surprised when Cat grabbed my hand.
“Coach, is thereanythingI can do?”
He exhaled a deep breath. “Look, I need to know. Is this marriage shit for real? What exactly happened?”
I pursed my lips and looked Cat in the eye. “Yes,” I said. “This ‘marriage shit’ is for real. I met an old fling and, well, we’re in love.”
Coach Slanch was silent for a moment. “An ‘old fling,’ eh?”
I winked at Cat. “Yes. We met in college. It’s a long story. Everything’s under control, coach. Don’t you worry.”
