“It’s really not a replacement. I’m just pursuing something different now.”
“Oh, I see. Well, if it doesn’t work out, you have my number.”
“Don’t get your hopes up, lil mama. But you can give me your number. I’m a free agent. I know that slow head hit different, and I’m trying to see what that be like.”
“Bro.” I couldn’t stop myself from laughing this time. Bianca rolled her eyes and stormed away. “Bro, you gotta chill.”
“Man, fuck her big-booty ass. Just make sure you invite her to my party so I can get some of that re-re head.”
I laughed. “You’s a fucking fool, man,” I said as I continued to laugh.
It wasa little after six when I pulled up to Alicia’s home. I was a little tipsy after I left the bar, and during my inebriated haze, I ventured into her neighborhood. I knew this shit was unorthodox, but I couldn’t get the smell or taste of her off my mind. I needed to see her face, and aside from that, I missed spending time with the kids on the weekends. I needed to remind her that she signed up for a nanny seven days a week, so she couldn’t renege on what the fuck she'd signed up for.
Instead of parking my truck on the street like I usually would, I pulled into her driveway and shut off the engine. I climbed out and walked up to her door, hitting the doorbell three times. It took a minute, but I finally heard the locks turning, then her beautiful face appeared.
She was on the phone as she looked at me confusedly.
“Mom, let me call you back.” She looked at me as I leaned on the door jamb. “What are you doing here, Basil? You aren’t scheduled for the weekends anymore.”
“I don’t remember agreeing to that, Ms. Alicia.”
“I’m allowed to change how many days I need, Mr. Cassidy.”
I smirked. “Oh, for real? That’s what we doing now?”
“I’m not sure what you’re talking about.”
“Mr. B! Mr. B!” Chloe yelled, rushing toward us and jumping into my arms. I held her tightly and tickled her sides as she laughed.
“Hey, Loe-Loe.”
“I missed you. Why you not come the other times?”
I looked at Alicia, who stared right back at me. “I had some things I had to do. But that’s about to change,” I told Chloe, but kept my eyes on her moms.
“I want to show you my new painting! Come on!” She wiggled out of my arms, then grabbed my hand, leading me inside the house. I didn’t look to see Alicia’s expression, but it didn’t matter. She wouldn’t deny the kids access to me.
I followed Chloe to the kitchen, where she pulled the painting from the fridge. She had drawn five stick figures with the sun, grass, and flowers surrounding them, and she’d put each name above the figures. When I saw my name, a light smile turned up on my lips.
“It’s a picture of us. My teacher said I could draw what makes me happy.”
“You did a good job, baby girl. I love it.” I kissed the top of her head, and she smiled brightly.
“Chloe bug, let me talk to Mr. B for a second. Go play with your brother, and I’ll come get you all for dinner, okay?”
“Okay, Mommy! Can Mr. B stay for dinner?”
“We’ll see, baby.”
Chloe hurried off, and Alicia’s eyes came to me. She didn’t speak until I moved closer to her, moving a piece of loose hair that fell out of her ponytail.
“Basil . . .”
“You can keep running, Alicia, but we both know that you want me just as much as I want you. I’m trying not to put pressure on you, but it’s hard and making me confused on what to do exactly—because I want you, like real bad, and not just in a sexual way. You’re a dope woman. It’s just fucked up that ol’ boy couldn’t see that, and he put that hurt on you. Now, he’s making it hard for men like me who just want to love and be loved.”
We were quiet for a moment before she looked up at me. “What if things become complicated? I don’t want my kids to suffer again.”
“You’re thinking too much about the negative, Ms. Alicia. I know you don’t trust yourself with me, due to the circumstances, but I promise if you let me in, I’ll erase every doubt.”Kiss on her cheek.“Every fear.”Her forehead.“Every low inhibition.” I slipped my tongue into her mouth, and she grabbed the sides of my face, deepening the kiss. That shit excited me and gave me just the confirmation I needed to apply the right amount of pressure to get her to be mine.
