I stood under the water and tried not to think about the bridge. About her arms around him. About the way he'd hugged her back like he was relieved to be somewhere simple.
Failed.
I tried not to think about my father's voice sayingcharity caselike it was a diagnosis. Like Liam was a disease his son had caught.
Failed at that too.
And now the coaches wanted us in a boat together. At the invitational. In front of everyone — donors, scouts, my father. Sitting behind Liam for two thousand meters, matching his rhythm, breathing with him, while my father watched from the bank and Emily cheered from the stands.
My stomach turned.
I shut the water off. Stood there dripping in the silence.
How was I supposed to do that? How was I supposed to sit in that boat and row with him like he was just a partner? Like mybody didn't know what his felt like? Like I hadn't had him in my bed two days ago while she thought they were on a break?
And he'd just — gone back. Like it was nothing. Like I was nothing.
I dried off. Got dressed — dark jeans, Kingswell hoodie. Sat on the bench with my phone in my hands, staring at the screen without seeing it.
Everything felt like it was closing in. My father. Liam. The invitational. The performance I'd have to give every single day at practice — pretending I hated him, pretending I didn't care, pretending my hands weren't shaking right now.
I couldn't fix any of it.
But there was one thing. One person I'd hurt who actually deserved better from me.
I opened a new message to Ethan.
Alex
I'm in. Just tell me what you need.
A few minutes passed.
Ethan
Okay. I'll send you a few tasks via email. Then meet me at the Riverside Club downtown next Wednesday. 3pm. Address: 47 River Street.
Alex
I'll be there.
Ethan
Don't be late.
That was it. No "thank you." No warmth. Just a warning not to waste his time.
Fair enough.
I grabbed my bag and headed out.
The cold air hit my face and I pulled my hood up. Students crossed the quad in waves — heading to class, to the dining hall, to lives that didn't involve hiding in locker rooms after eavesdropping on their father threatening their coach.
Liam had chosen Emily. My father wanted to destroy the one thing that made rowing feel alive again. And in a couple of weeks I might be sitting in a boat with the person who was breaking my heart while the person who wanted to control my life watched from shore.
I didn't have a plan for any of that.
But I could show up on Wednesday. I could help Ethan with the mixer. I could try to be someone worth forgiving.
