After dinner, I carry Elena up to the nursery that Deck and Vivian have set up in one of the lodge's back rooms. She stirs when I lay her in the portable crib but doesn't wake. I stand there for a moment, watching her sleep, thinking about futures I never let myself imagine before Mara.
"You're good with her."
I turn. Mara is in the doorway, backlit by the warm glow from the hall.
"She's easy to be good with."
"Mmhm." She moves into the room, sliding her arms around my waist from behind. "You know what I was thinking?"
"I never know what you're thinking. That's part of your charm."
"I was thinking about the guest room." She rests her chin on my shoulder. "The one full of server equipment."
"What about it?"
"I was thinking it might need to become something else eventually." Her arms tighten around me. "Something with smaller furniture. And maybe a mobile."
My heart stops.
I turn in her arms, searching her face. "Mara."
"I'm not pregnant." She smiles at my expression. "Not yet. But I've been thinking about it. About us. About what we're building here." She takes my hands, placing them on her stomach. "I want this, Boone. With you. When we're ready."
"When?" My voice comes out rough.
"When you're done being terrified by the idea." Her smile widens. "I give it about thirty seconds."
"Twenty." I pull her against me, burying my face in her hair. "Maybe fifteen."
"That's my strategist." She holds me just as tightly. "Always ahead of schedule."
We stand there in the dim nursery, holding each other, while Elena sleeps peacefully in her crib and the sounds of family drift in from the other room. And I think about plans. All the plans I've made in my life. The missions I've mapped, the contingencies I've prepared, the futures I've tried to control.
None of them led here.
This moment, this woman, this life. I didn't plan any of it. Couldn't have predicted it. Wouldn't have believed it if someone had told me two years ago that I'd be standing in a nursery, thinking about babies, with a quantum physicist wrapped in my arms.
Chaos. Beautiful, perfect chaos.
"I love you." The words are easy now. I say them every day, multiple times, making up for all the years I didn't have anyone to say them to.
"I love you too." She pulls back, her hazel eyes bright with tears she won't let fall. "Now take me home, Mr. Garrett. I believe we have an anniversary to finish celebrating."
"Yes ma'am."
I take her hand and lead her out of the nursery, past the living room where our family is still gathered, out into the cold Nevada night. The stars are bright overhead, and the mountains rise dark against the sky, and somewhere in the distance, a wolf howls.
Mara tucks herself against my side as we walk the path to our cabin. Our cabin. Our home.
"Hey, Boone?"
"Yeah?"
"Thank you."
"For what?"
"For blocking my car with your truck." She grins up at me. "Best tactical decision you ever made."
