The glint of the chain around my neck catches my eye in the mirror. The ring is tucked safely in my drawer along with the bills I’m struggling to pay.
The confidence from wearing the chain is what I need for my job interview, although the message inscribed in the ring is a reminder that I didn’t know Liam.
Love you always, you feckless playboy xx
I touch my lips. I shouldn’t remember anything that happened with him.
“You look beautiful, Mummy.”
My reflection highlights why Tabi shouldn’t be allowednear make-up. I look like I’ve been slapped across the cheeks. “Thank you, nugget.” I force a smile.
“Are you scared?” Tabi sits on my lap and leans back, staring into my eyes.
I nod and sigh loudly enough for Sasha to join us in my bedroom. “Do you remember your first day at preschool and how worried you were?”
Tabi shrugs, her black curls bouncing.
“It’s a bit like that. I don’t know anyone at this place.”
“The car zoom place?”
“Yes. The car zoom place.” I chuckle as Sasha sits on my bed. “I want them to give me a job as an office assistant. But I won’t be working with grandma and grandpa at the carpet company anymore.”
Car zoom is a good description for Coulter Racing, the team that finished fifth in the Formula One Championship last season.
“We’d best get to preschool, Tabi. Mummy needs to look less like a lobster,” Sasha teases, pointing at my face. “Give her a kiss and get your shoes on, okay?”
Tabi licks her lips and gives me a slobbery kiss. “You’re going to be the bestest, Mummy. The bestest car zoom ‘sistant.” She jumps off my lap and runs out of my bedroom.
I use a wet wipe to remove some of the slobber and the makeup she attacked me with.
Sasha passes me a letter. “It’s your credit card company again.”
“I should stay at the carpet company. It’s reliable, and I don’t have a chance at this job.”
“That’s your mum speaking. You’re going to get it. Even though cars aren’t your thing?—”
“I don’t know anything about them other than I can’t afford to keep fixing the pile of shit I have. It’s not rugby, but the clubs I contacted don’t have jobs. I should give up mydreams. Maybe I can do something when Tabi’s grown up like my mum suggested.”
“What else did your mum say?”
“She suggested I’m letting Tabi down. Last night, she called to tell me there’s no future in sports, especially not for a working single mum trying to bring up a young child. She said that the family carpet business is reliable and it’s a job for life, unlike the sports industry.”
“She’s wrong,” Sasha shouts, her voice louder than Tabi’s singing in the corridor. “You’re going to get this job. And it’s one step closer to training as a sports psychologist. You’re right, it’s not working for a rugby team or doing your master’s, but working for a company in the sports industry is better than carpets.”
“I could beg my parents for a pay rise. Tabi’s starting school after the summer, and she’ll need more clothes, and she keeps growing?—”
“Breathe, Rosie. You’re doing amazing with her. I’m proud of all you’re juggling.”
I cradle my head as she feeds my need for praise and reassurance. Light catches the chain around my neck. I run my fingers over it, remembering what my fake husband said about dreaming and living.
“I know that look. “Liam” may be why you’re finally reaching for your dreams, but he also wore a ring around his neck with a sweet inscription that you worried about the whole journey back from Greece. Kisses in an inscription don’t mean he was married.” Sasha elbows me. “I’m still not sure why you gave him your expensive knickers, though.”
“I hate that you know what I’m thinking.” I tuck the chain under the collar of my blouse. “I need the confidence I had when I jumped off the cliff in Rhodes.”Before the best kiss of my life.
“Are you prepared for the interview?”
Iwince. “I researched their last season, but Tabi couldn’t sleep last night, so I brought her to my bed. Hopefully they won’t ask me about anything before last year,” I say with a half-hearted laugh. “Besides, it’s a Monday to Friday daytime job on their administration team. I can do that with my eyes closed and Tabi strapped to my leg.”
