I freeze and nearly topple Niki, who stumbles in the process.
“You’ve been looking after me? But your anxiety,” I stutter.
“I made it work. Sasha’s auntie told me you weren’t contagious, although I’ve been speaking with my private doctor three times a day and checking my temperature on the hour. Today’s the first day I’ve not worn gloves,” he says. “I’ll always show up for you in the way I can if you’ll still have me. I love you.”
“I love you, too.” My tears fall again, not just from his words, but because he cared for me. “I never want to be apart from you again. I’m sorry for reacting like I did on Sunday.”
“I was a dick to you. I can’t believe what I said. I thought I’d lost you forever. I’m so sorry. You and Tabi are it for me.But before you agree to a future with me, you need to know I probably won’t ever be one hundred per cent okay with my anxiety,” he says apologetically.
I squeeze his hand. “You’ll always be two hundred per cent perfect to me.”
He rolls his eyes, but he’s beaming. “Let’s hope they teach Tabi maths when she gets to school and don’t leave it to you. And hopefully she’s not got your cheesy genes. That statement was ridiculous.” I elbow him. “Let’s get you back to bed. Otherwise I’ll declare my love like I’m in one of Tabi’s fairytales.”
“You’re too cute. And if you want to drive again, I’m fully behind you because you’re amazing at it. I want you to chase your dreams.” He stares at me as I babble. “Oh no. Shit.”
He freezes. “What is it? Are you okay?”
I swear I hear his heart thudding in his chest. “You’re meant to be in Hungary, not here. You can’t be here. Where’s your passport? You need to sort out your jet, and I’ll pack you a bag.” I fluster and try to step away from him.
Niki takes the opportunity to pick me up in his arms. He tucks his hand under my legs, and on instinct, I wrap my arm around his neck.
“Rosie, stop trying to look after me. I’m flying out tomorrow night, and if you’re well enough, you’re coming with me because I want you at this race more than anything. Sasha’s agreed to join us and babysit Tabi in Budapest while the race is on because it might be overwhelming.” He carries me to my bed and tucks me under the duvet.
“How did you get her to agree to that?”
“I invited her to the mid-season after-party. My parents will sit with Tabi at the hotel while Sasha tries it on with all the drivers.”
“But you should be in Hungary right now,” I implore him. “You should be at practice.”
“I’ll be there for third practice and qualifying. You needed me. Senna wanted me to come here nearly as much as I wanted to be here.”
“But your reputation. Filip won’t believe you’re committed. It’s not driving for him, but reputation matters.”
He smiles at my panic. I give him a half-hearted shove.
“Your hands are dry. You were so sick. I was really worried about you.” He takes my hands in his and massages cream into my skin.
“Niki,” I shout when he still doesn’t respond to my worries.
“Don’t you want to know why I’m desperate for you to attend the race on Sunday?”
“Yes, but I need you to go to Hungary right now.”
“If you weren’t so gross, I’d kiss that beautiful mouth of yours.”
“You’re infuriating.”
He laughs as Tabi runs in with a biscuit tin and water bottle. “I tried to bring paper straws, but I dropped them. Graham’s got them.”
Graham waddles in with sopping paper straws hanging from his jowls.
“Thank you, Graham.” Niki blanches as Graham drops them unceremoniously on the carpet.
“Why is Mummy grumpy?” Tabi asks.
I squeeze on sanitiser as Niki lifts Tabi, pulls her onto the bed with us, and grabs Graham, too.
“Your bed isn’t big enough for all of us. You and Tabi need to move in with me.”
