“But not all drivers are nobs, right?” Niki says, joining us.
“You used to be,” Jacs replies with a wink. “Don’t let Niki tell you otherwise. He was the biggest wanker on the circuit. I’d best go. The safety car is ending.”
She walks off, leaving me unsettled. The sooner Niki’s better, the sooner things might change between us. I want him healthy. It’s my selfishness getting in the way of this. I can’t tell him I want him to be the man he is now rather than the healthy one he should be.
“You okay?” he asks, holding out his hand.
“Yeah, all good.” I thread my fingers with his and let the warmth act as reassurance that things will be okay. “It’s noisy, isn’t it?”
“Hold on.” He grabs ear defenders and gently places them over my ears, then kisses my cheek.
Perfect, he mouths and holds my hand again as we watch the race.
My passion grows for this sport with every passing second, and it’s not because Niki’s touching me and bouncing with each lap.
The thrill I got from sitting beside Niki as he raced energised me. On screen, Billy and Tawny battle. He dogs her as she races down a straight. She reaches a corner, and her car wobbles as she drives over the raised edge.
Niki shakes his head.
My chest bubbles with anxiety as Tawny takes another corner. I glance at others in the garage. Everyone watches the screens. Engineers talk into microphones.
Billy’s unrelenting. Niki leans forward. He grips me tighter as Billy tries to overtake.
Hairpin corner, Niki mouths to me.
Billy isn’t holding back. I understood some of what Jacs said about his inability to see danger.
I glance at Niki.
Can he predict the danger in what we’re doing? Holding me like this is a public declaration of what we are to each other.
A relationship with me has complications he’s not ready for. I don’t want a new dad for Tabi, but I need someone who respects and loves her even when she’s at her worst. Can he be that guy but also the man who drives?
Looking at how he focuses on the screen, I see a man desperate to race again.
On the plane, Niki said cars struggle to overtake at Monaco because it’s a tight track around the city. It’s like Billy hasn’t got the memo. Every chance he gets, he tries to push past.
Niki shakes his head.
The tension in the garage is palpable.
Adrenaline drips through my veins.
The risks are screaming through the silence of my ear defenders.
Tawny gets away, but it won’t be long before Billy fights with her again.
Every race involves risk of injury and possible death. The same fire lighting Niki’s eyes was there when he was inside me last night. I want that again.
I’m shaking as I look between him and the race.
As if sensing my anguish and excitement, he pulls me in front of him and holds me against his chest. His heartbeat thuds against my back.
The screen switches to Connor accelerating down a straight. It’s the power, the risk, and the control. I need that. Ineed Niki again, because the tension inside me will snap if I don’t have him again tonight.
Niki’s arms tighten around me like he senses something. I’m breathless as I lean against him. This race does things to me because I want the adrenaline-fueled Niki inside me with each lap. How can cars racing around a track be so sexual?
He moves the ear defenders. “Is the race making you horny, angel?”
